“Assed” By A Flight Attendant

July 11, 2010

in Attendant & Pilot Stories

Not a story, but an observation about flight crews:

There seems to be two distinct categories of FAs: those that respect personal space and those who do not.

We have just returned from Mexico, and our carrier’s flight crew falls into the latter category. I was whacked by a FA moving in the aisle at least half a dozen times. No apologies. My wife was sprayed by opening pop cans three times, until the FA offered her a comped drink.

During the flight I was ‘assed’ by a FA three times (read as ‘butt in my face’ and elbowed once – “oh, sorry”).

{ 52 comments… read them below or add one }

Glenn R July 12, 2010 at 3:51 am

If your body parts are hanging into the aisle you WILL be whacked. I'm sure the flight attendants weren't the only ones banging into you as they passed by your row.

Reply

Wallywhereuat November 27, 2016 at 10:03 am

I think all flight attendents are hot and don't mind buffalo butts hitting me on the shoulder every now and then but that's just me

Reply

Memee July 12, 2010 at 7:30 am

Sorry Glenn, But I am 5ft tall,weigh 120 lb, and have been whacked by FA on many occasions, when none of my body parts were hanging over my seat. I realize the aisle is narrow, but an "Excuse me." would be nice.

It is common courtesy in any situation.

Reply

Jody July 12, 2010 at 7:43 am

At least FA body parts are usually soft. What's worse is when you're sitting in your seat and passengers come down the aisle with bags slung over their shoulders; they often don't pay attention to where said bags are swinging. I've had to bat bags out of the way on several occasions.

Reply

jim July 12, 2010 at 10:43 am

This happened to me recently too. I am an average sized guy, 6', 185 lbs. I do go to the gym, etc….but, am not a pumped up guy that spreads into the aisle.

But, the flight attendant had a buffalo butt…and, every time she went by, she had to kinda swing it to get down the aisle….and, every time she swung, she hit my shoulder. And, never apologized. Then when she was serving the aisle, opposite of me…she bent over and there in all it's glory is her big butt in my face.

I truly understand why there used to be more tight guidelines to the weight of a flight attendant. It is a tight space….and, it is very unpleasant to be smacked by their rear ends.

Reply

Sophie May 11, 2011 at 8:06 pm

jim, this isnt a real reply but I just had to tell you that your story had me wiping tears from my eyes from laughing so hard. (and forget trying to read it aloud to my roomates.) You certainly have a way with words. XD

Reply

John McIntosh July 13, 2010 at 10:18 am

I've been in the same situation. NOT sticking out into the aisle but still bumped by the FA multiple times. She was simply a "little" large in her hindquarters and my shoulders filled the seat. One would have thought after the third or forth time she would have learned to turn a little as she went by.

Reply

noooob July 13, 2010 at 12:05 pm

Spank that Ass

Reply

Laura July 13, 2010 at 3:14 pm

What is she supposed to say other than "oh sorry?"

Reply

Sara July 14, 2010 at 12:44 am

I am a FA and only weigh 120 lbs. I am a small person. But the aisles are narrow, passengers stick body parts in the aisle and don't move, and there is turbulence. When serving I often have to hold on to seats or bins. I do my best to apologize, but with hundreds of passengers a day I sometimes don't notice a small bump.

Reply

Johnny Crotchman July 16, 2010 at 4:40 pm

They are merely acting like the cattle that they are there to fetch drinks for.

Reply

Howie Feltersnatch July 17, 2010 at 1:32 pm

Johnny Crotchman, I don't think it is an act. The miserable twats that are hired to be waitresses on planes generally are classless bimbos who have no education or manners and could care less about passenger comfort or safety. You get what you pay for so you might as well pay for first class seating since the waitresses there are at least trained to act like they can tolerate your presence for the duration of the flight.

Reply

Debbie July 17, 2010 at 2:22 pm

WOW, how Fricken rude! You are a low life….how can you lump all the flight attendants into on category of classless, un-educated bimbos? I am one of those flight attendants, 2 bachelor degrees, commercial and flight instructor rating and I have been in the military for 24 years and I am not the exception. Just because someone brings you drinks does not mean they are less of a person then you……thankfully most of the passengers do not act like you……worthless snail poop

Reply

Tiger Lily with a Ma August 1, 2010 at 2:23 am

Wowie Howie you must be one of those jerk passengers or do you just hate women because they can't stand you!

Reply

Davey Shitepant July 17, 2010 at 4:22 pm

Yes, I am sure that you really believe your own prevarications. With all of your supposed expertise and the best that you can do is serve drinks on an airliner. And for someone supposedly so well educated the best that you can do is "worthless snail poop"?

Reply

debbie July 17, 2010 at 5:36 pm

Yes David Shitpants…Your so rude! Your an embarrassment to the flying public. Worthless snail poop was what I came up with as to not offend anyone reading this bunch of crap from all you whiners. I cannot believe how a few of you stereotype the crew but put yourselves on such high pedestals. Kind of sad in this day and age Mr High and Mighty

Reply

Sacha July 5, 2011 at 10:34 pm

Sorry, but I don't believe someone with "2 bachelor degrees" wouldn't know the difference between "your" and "you're". I'm pretty sure I learned that in elementary school, in fact. Don't pretend you're a passably educated person if you're not willing to put in the minimal effort to make it convincing.

Reply

Mel Gibson is God July 17, 2010 at 5:55 pm

Debbie, you seem quite upset by a few off color comments, someone with your extensive education and experience is normally not so flustered by cheap internet talk unless of course you obtained your degrees from the University of Phoenixs' wonderful on line studies. That would explain your lack of vocabulary, logic and reasoning, which interestingly enough would make you a fine stewardess. So now I will say something you likely hear everyday- shut up and get me a drink you talentless bimbo, and this time try to keep your tit out of my drink glass.

Reply

debbie July 17, 2010 at 6:40 pm

Yep and someone with a user name this week of "Mel Gibson is God" …you are defiantly someone who we should all look up to and listen to….Yes, I will keep my tit out of your drink while I totally ignore you on your future flights….just remember, you should also mind your manners while in public

Reply

Cathy July 18, 2010 at 2:55 pm

I would like to add this….most flight attendants have degrees. They are not uneducated bimbos. Next time you're on a plane you better hope and pray there's not an emergency….you'll be crying like a baby for the flight attendant to save your ass.

Reply

Jim July 19, 2010 at 5:22 am

Cathy and Debbie,

I worked for the airlines. I know the requirements for Flight Attendants. The requirements are minimal… a high school diploma.

The training they receive is also minimal…the life saving treatment, is similar to what a teenage lifeguard receives. And, the defense training is what most housewives would receive at their local YMCA.

I'm not sure why flight attendants have such delusions of grandeur.

99% of the flight attendants job is serving drinks and helping with seat assignment disputes….flight attendants are the face of the airline and as such should be professional, friendly, etc… But, most are surly, frumpy, and mad at the world.

At one point and time, the flight attendants were revered, respected and thought of fondly. Many people wanted to become one…it was somewhat glamorous. However, most flight attendants are now despised because of their arrogant, hateful attitude.

Yeah…maybe they know how to engage the slide should an emergency occur….but, again 99% of the time, there will be no emergencies.

And, you really want us to support you in your labor disputes? Get real…until you treat the flying public with a little respect, don't expect our support….it's not brain surgery for goodness sakes…as such, you are well compensated for the job you do.

Reply

GlennR July 19, 2010 at 7:58 am

When you say you worked for the airlines. You worked for all of them?

How amazing that the passengers on the aircraft that ditched in the Hudson may have felt the same way until they were evacuated by the "minimally trained" flight attendants. I wonder how the man who had a heart attack on my flight to Paris during the spring felt when he was treated by a "minimally trained" flight attendant. Surprisingly, his wife sure was thankful for us and our training. A few years ago I had to take down a psychotic woman. She was a threat to the other passengers and crew. I had to tackle her, subdue her and put her in tough cuffs- (handcuffs). Where she lay on the galley floor for three and a half hours. Until we landed in Paris. The deplaning passengers thanked me and were grateful for our function on the airplane- as "minimally trained" as I am. This hateful rhetoric is not unusual. The condescending comments very common- until you find yourself in an emergency situation. I sure hope you were paying attention to the demo.

Reply

Jim July 19, 2010 at 8:41 am

I worked for one airline. But, have friends that work for several others. The requirements are basically the same for each.

I apologize for the condescension. But, am truly tired of being treated like second class citizens by flight attendants and airline employees. I am sorry if your contracts with your employers suck, lapse, etc… But, that is no reason to take it out on your paying customers. We are in a terrible downward spiral, you treat us with disdain, so in turn we give you no respect. The only difference is, we are the customer and chopse to fly your bankrupt airline over the other bankrupt airlines.

Know that a smile, a greeting, a thanks for flying our airline, and genuine concerns about delays and cancelled flights, would truly go a long way…and, you would be surprised at the respect we would give you in return for your care. To you a delayed or cancelled flight may be an inconvenience to your work day, or "just another day at the office". But, remember to the business traveller the delayed or cancelled flight could mean he misses making a sale, which means no commission, which means he cannot pay his mortgage. To the vacation traveller, a delayed or cancelled flight may mean they miss their cruise….the cruise they already paid for, and looked forward to for many months. For most of us, vacation time is at a premium so to miss a few days of vacation, or all of it because of flight delays, is quite frustrating….so, sorry if we get upset. Some genuine concern from you would go a long way…but, I guess that is not your job…you are only there for our safety.

Let's call a spade a spade. You are trained in CPR. You are trained in self-defense. And, you are trained to release the emergency slide. Did you go to medical school? Do you have a degree in criminal justice or go to the police academy? NO. You can administer CPR. Good. Thank you. That is part of your job.

But, I remain that 99% of the time, on 99% of the flights, your primary function is to serve drinks, deal with seating arrangements, and be the "face of the airline" by making the flight as enjoyable as possible.

The airlines are losing money…and, one of the big reasons is because of the uncaring attitude of many of their employees….the face of the airline.

Perform your mundane day to day tasks with care and take pride in them….you will be surprised at the change in the customers attitude.

Reply

Ray Doobman July 20, 2010 at 4:34 pm

Yeah, most stewardesses have degrees, riiiight. And most strippers are "working their way through college. Are you delusional or profoundly stupid ?

Reply

Cathy-Does-Dallas July 19, 2010 at 4:16 am

Cathy i agree….Most flight attendants have degrees in How to be a complete BITCH. If the plane is going to crash your probably gonna die anyway so you wont be crying for the useless stuck up bitch…you 'll be praying (if you believe) to god.

Reply

debbie July 19, 2010 at 9:42 am

WOW, who ever you are Cathy-Does-Dallas….you don't have any idea what your talking about but thanks for the useless input, you are a real piece of work. What exactly do you do for a living that gives you the right to insult an entire workforce who are there to help people?

Reply

Cathy July 19, 2010 at 11:55 am

Wow CDD…what an unusual name. I'm not going to argue with you or defend what I do for a living. I know I'm not a bitch to the passengers. But I will say this….you're most likely the chick that boards the plane with an over-stuffed bag and bitches when you can't fit it in the overhead bin….you're most likely wearing some Daisy Dukes and a tank top, and a pair of Old Navy flip flops. You then complain that you're cold and why aren't there any blankets on this friggin plane! You most likely fly once a year and are totally clueless about using your manners, but yet I'm supposed to kiss your ass (with a smile of course).

Reply

Debbie July 19, 2010 at 9:39 am

Jim, please don't fly on commercial airline….it would be a shame if one of those un-trained flight attendants had to do something to save your live or help you in anyway especially if it means they might have to take time away from something more important…..like serving a drink to anyone else on the airplane. Your attitude towards flight attendants and airline employees is amazing. And I am sure that you keep changing your user name so you can keep responding to both me and Cathy….please stop your trolling.

Reply

Jim July 19, 2010 at 10:19 am

Debbie,

This will be my last post to this story. But, you have proven you are delusional. I only post under Jim.

Because of your poor grammar, punctuation and spelling, I too question your two bachelor degrees. Really? After two degrees, you still have difficulty with standard written principles?

And, you are an instructor? No wonder service sucks, if you are the teacher.

Buh, Bye.

Reply

Cathy July 19, 2010 at 1:07 pm

She never said she was a FA instrutor. Go back and read her post. So quick to judge and not one fact straight.

Reply

Cathy July 19, 2010 at 1:08 pm

*instructor

Reply

debbie July 19, 2010 at 11:35 am

Yes and you didn't prove any point except for the fact that your a ass! Buh Bye Mr Asshole

Reply

Cathy July 19, 2010 at 11:57 am

Make that a double buh-bye asshole (smile)

Reply

Cathy-Does-DALLAS July 19, 2010 at 6:24 pm

Cathy im no chick im taking the piss out of you,but you are to stupid to realise. I guess thats why you became a FA. What i cant undestand is why people like you and debbie become a FA in the first place?. I also fly more times a year than you have sex. Now go smile and be nice to the pax…Thats what your FUCKING paid for!

Reply

Bob July 20, 2010 at 11:07 am

Excellent, Cathy and Debbie you have just proven Jim's point, your reply to him was as classless as the rest of your drivel. You really should face facts in that your chosen "career" is menial labor at best. As far as professionalism- neither of you have any as evidenced by your grade school caliber responses. Perhaps you should seek employment elsewhere as your attitudes are so terrible that you personify the rude, uneducated and arrogant sterotype that you claim you are not. Most folks I know dread flying precisely because of tarts like you two and the bottom line (bankrupt airlines) reflects your poor work ethic and lack of anything close to enthusiasm. For someone who is supposedly so well educated (two degrees) you certainly do not conduct yourself as anything more than a common street walker judging by your vocabulary or lack thereof. Anyway, your last post sums things up rather nicely with your "Buh Bye asshole" reply, this in a nut shell shows your rotten attitude, your lack of education and your total disregard for your job, your fellow employees and your employer. Now you have a great day and Buh Bye.

Reply

Debbie July 20, 2010 at 11:25 am

UM BOB/AKA Jim. Please stop posting. Your embarrassing yourself and insulting some very nice people with your stupidity. I am far from a street walker but I can tell by your attitude on these posts that you are probably treated badly because of the way you treat people. I am so insulted with your sexism and stereotyping and I can tell you are not well educated. I feel sorry for you that you have such a bad outlook on life and feel the need to insult people and their careers. I am sure in your line of work or lack there of you, in your own mind are important, but in my world you are nothing. Please, get back to those help wanted pages so you find something to do throughout the day instead of insulting hard working people with respectable jobs. I can tell you are not educated or married and you must be very lonely and bitter.

Reply

Doug July 20, 2010 at 11:38 am

O.K. no one else has asked…so I will…..

Debbie, where in the hell did you go to school? Your grammar and spelling is atrocious….even for a blog!

Are you truly an adult, or a kid just commenting on adult things?

You must have a lot of impedimenta that has held you back from being able to properly construct a sentence and spell.

Maybe in your downtime between saving people's lives on the plane, you could study some grammar books. Or, if you are just a kid, maybe this summer instead of posting incomprehensible sentences on blogs, you should do some book learnin'.

As to the original story. Yes, I have been bumped by some flight attendants too. The space is very small, and I don't know for a fact, but I wonder if the aisles are now smaller than they were in the past? Of course, everyone is larger, and they have relaxed the weight/height requirements for FA's….

Reply

debbie July 20, 2010 at 12:20 pm

Thanks AKA Jim/BOB/Doug…..thanks for the insults. Please, go get a job or girlfriend AND a shrink……you have issues.

Reply

Bob July 20, 2010 at 2:25 pm

Actually you may want to seek the services of a mental health professional as it seems that your paranoia has gotten the best of you. I don't post my two cents worth under anyone else's name and have never had the pleasure of meeting either Jim or Doug. Since you asked I am self employed and unfortunately my business makes it necessary for me to be a frequent flyer so I know of which I speak. My business and outlook on life are both doing wonderfully thanks to working diligently on both for many years. I am also happily married for over twenty years and have three daughters who if they were ever to suffer a sudden and precipitious drop in intelligence I would still try to talk them out of becoming a flying waitress for fear of them ever becoming anything like you, namely bitter, resentful and quite frankly very creepy. Now if you don't mind I have a life to get back to (unlike you) so have a nice day and buh bye.

Reply

Debbie July 20, 2010 at 2:34 pm

Oh yes, please get back to your life….buh buy asshole….

Reply

Bob July 20, 2010 at 3:10 pm

Uh…… it is spelled bye, genius. Oh and did I mention how absolutely classy you are ? no ? there is a reason.

Reply

Debbie July 20, 2010 at 3:49 pm

Buh Buy……It was a joke asshole….Class???? Yes, you have none. I am sure I won't be seeing you on my flights since you travel by bus! Buh BYE BYE…. SMILE…. WINK…. asshole

Reply

Howie Feltersnatch July 20, 2010 at 4:23 pm

Wow, what a babe ! you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth ? If you even work I will be shocked and if you work for an airline……well I guess I can believe that easily enough. Speaking of working for an airline, if you do, I bet that you are in charge of cleaning out the toilet holding tank which is a great deal for you since you have unlimited snacks as part of your compensation. The spanish word for what you are made of is caca so I bet you are a real caca sucker when it comes to cleaning out the holding tank, but be careful since you will probably be sucking your relatives out of that tank and feel free to search around in the poo for the tip I left you for your delightful service. Now please return to the gutter from whence you sprang and please do not rear your ugly and I do mean ugly head around here anymore.

Reply

Johnny July 20, 2010 at 4:25 pm

Your ass**** winks and smiles ? you need to take that show on the road.

Reply

Johnny July 20, 2010 at 4:29 pm

Oh yeah, I forgot to ask – what exactly is a joke ass**** is that something that can be purchased at Spencer Gifts ?

Reply

Debbie July 20, 2010 at 4:02 pm

I am not even sure what this thread was about….so the aisle is narrow and you were bumped….Really? A Flight from Hell? If you board early your going to be bumped a lot by pretty much everyone who boards. This does not make a flight from hell.

Reply

Debbie July 20, 2010 at 4:43 pm

Moderator…please close this thread, it's very offensive, insulting, sexist and not a flight from hell. It's just a link to insult.

Reply

Gregg - admin July 20, 2010 at 5:04 pm

Debbie – I want to keep it open so that others in the future can submit their comments. But for those in the current conversation, you're obviously not going to change each other's minds, so why continue the discussion? Just ignore each other's comments and the pissing match will end.

Reply

rerere August 1, 2010 at 2:55 am

Rightly said Gregg!

Reply

Hack November 6, 2012 at 6:12 pm

Jim, Gregg, Rerere, Dina, Jody, and Mindy and a few other commenters are the only decent commenters anyway.

Reply

Light Sleeper January 22, 2015 at 7:29 pm

Not a flight from hell, but relevant. I fell asleep on a plane, and must have lolled out of the side of my aisle seat. I was awoken by something soft pushing into my face. It was the rear end of a flight attendant who was serving a passenger on the other side of the aisle. Very embarrassing once I realised what was happening. Surely that wasn't necessary.

Reply

Maggie May 13, 2015 at 5:09 pm

I notice in certain cultures (korean and mexican in particular) that it's perfectly acceptable for people to rub up against complete strangers. I can't stand it, personally, but at least I know wtf their deal is, now!

Reply

Leave a Comment
Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *




Previous post:

Next post: