Incessant Whiner

November 24, 2008

in Baby & Kid Stories

I recently flew from San Diego to Milwaukee, with a connecting flight in Denver.

On the first leg of my flight (San Diego to Denver), there was a family seated about 4 rows behind me. They had a 2- or 3-year-old boy who proceeded to whine (and I mean “whine”) very loudly for the entire duration of the trip. He kept chanting over and over: “Nooooo. Leave me alone.” I thought he’d whine himself to sleep eventually, but as we were leaving the plane, he was still whining.

As I rushed to catch my connecting flight to Milwaukee, I thought to myself: “Thank goodness I won’t have to listen to that little whiner anymore.”

Well, I was wrong. Not only was that little whiner on my flight to Milwaukee, but he and his parents were seated directly across the aisle from me. And you guessed it…he started whining right off the bat.

And he whined and whined and whined throughout the entire flight. And not once did any of the flight attendants say anything to the parents (who were both watching the in-flight TVs and were oblivious to the noise).

When the plane landed, and I was walking toward the baggage claim, I couldn’t help myself when I saw the family walking ahead of me. I sped up, and as I passed I said, “Thanks a lot for just putting me through 5 hours of agony with your son’s incessant whining. Have you ever considered that your allowing him to whine was blatantly rude?” Then I hurried away as they stood their with their mouths dropped to their shoes.

{ 153 comments… read them below or add one }

Jeanie November 12, 2008 at 5:03 am

I admire your restraint.

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Kevin April 2, 2009 at 8:23 am

Maybe if you wouldn't have "hurried away" you could have listened while they told you that the pressure of flying bothers their son's ears and that there is nothing they can do about it.

Come on people, give me a break. Buy some earplugs or a decent pair of headphones. I can't stand people who get upset with children on a plane. And no, I'm not a parent with a young child, just a reasonable person.

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Rebecca April 2, 2009 at 8:28 am

Sounds like you're the one whining…it's not easy to travel with kids and people like you don't make it any better.

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miles March 19, 2010 at 10:08 pm

I will have to say that i was flaying all the way down from northern germany to australia and i had two kids with me on my way down there. beatutiful silence and a little bit of smiling thats all i got from these two. i was flying club and everything was fine. no inconvinience at all. there is stuff parents can do, believe me. just sitting there doing nothing will definitively not help and so i think hes got a point there to be honest…

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Joe September 3, 2015 at 7:59 am

Pressurised cabins cause inner ear pain for some children with small ears. I had this as a child. The pain is intense – it’s an earache in both ears, and also it feels like you can’t pop your ears, constantly building pressure, it feels like your head will explode. I have small ears, and one flight I went on when I was 11 left me completely deaf in one ear for a month afterwards. And my parents knew about the ear pain, I had those specialised pressure relieving ear plugs, sucked a sweet, and took painkillers before the flight, and I was still in agony (I wasn’t crying or anything by age 11, but I did when I was younger.) People need to have more patience with children on an aeroplane, which is anyway a horrible, stressful and frightening experience all round.

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Daniel April 2, 2009 at 8:44 am

Grow up.

Most of the time, trying to get the kids to stop whining only makes the problem worse.

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Dori April 2, 2009 at 8:48 am

Oh, I don't know. I've got three kids of my own, and I'd be appalled if they behaved like that on a plane. Sorry, but everyone else has paid their money too, and they shouldn't have to listen to that. If it's a pain issue, then you do what you can, but to just ignore it and watch your TV, is pretty disrespectful to the rest of the passengers.

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parent of three chil April 2, 2009 at 8:56 am

By your story I think I can safely assume that you don't have much experience with children, or your limited experience is with children that just happen to be extremely docile. Two and three years old children do not have the capacity for empathy nor can they be reason with on any meaningful level. If they are emotionally distraught or in pain due to pressure (as I remember being on flights as a child), then making them shut up is often impossible.

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Father December 4, 2015 at 1:34 pm

Let me say all you crusaders are obviously lousy parents. Can't do anything about the whining? Absolutely NOT true. Good luck with your brats when they are teenagers.

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Tavi April 2, 2009 at 9:12 am

I completely disagree with the laissez-faire parental apologists who have posted here. Although it quite true that a 2 or 3-year-old cannot usually be reasoned with, it is also true that parents of toddlers have a responsibility to do something other than put headphones over their own ears and blatantly ignore the rights and comfort of their fellow passengers.

When I flew with my toddler, my entire purse, carry-on, and diaper bag were filled with toys, books, chewy-things, and various other diversions for my child. Never once did I think I had the right to ignore his whining and make other passengers endure it. That is selfish and irresponsible parenting, and I applaud this writer for daring to confront the parents with some cold, hard facts of life.

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Joan June 20, 2016 at 6:49 pm

Finally a person who thinks of others….THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

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bubba April 2, 2009 at 9:12 am

You obviously don't have kids. when you do, you'll realize that 2-3 yr old kids aren't old enough to realize that they may annoy others. They also express their discomforts verbally as that is the only way they can communicate. That's not rude. You're rude for not realizing that and being considerate of the parents.

I hope your kid whines 24/7 all 18 years he or she lives with you. Karma is real!

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Kiri the Can Opener February 1, 2011 at 8:19 pm

bubba clearly whined for the entire first 35 years of his life that he spent living in his parents' trailer home. Karma indeed…

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Sonki April 2, 2009 at 9:16 am

Well..the child had a reason to whine. He's 2 or 3. What was yours? Have some empathy for such a young child who is flying, he or she doesn't have the same ability to express his / her feelings or discomfort as you. I have seen parents of young children go through a really tough time on flights, adults, well, they should just be more accomadating

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Melanie April 2, 2009 at 9:24 am

You are an idiot! Do you expect families with children not to fly? You are probably one of those people that think families with children shouldn't go out to eat too? And asking a toddler to stop whining?? That is funny! You will soon understand when you have children it's definitely NOT that easy. Get a clue and suck it up!

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zebra April 2, 2009 at 9:30 am

It is your choice to have kids and your choice to be a good parent or not.

If your child is in pain during flight than find another way to travel instead of using whichever mode is most convienent for you.

The assumptions that the writer has no children is as assine as those who assume the parents were poor victims. Maybe the author has children who s/he has taught to behave in public.

Until the day there is a noisy and quiet section of flights, a person who has paid their fare should be able to travel in peace.

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Joan b June 20, 2016 at 6:51 pm

Hip Hip Hurray — you are so very correct…

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pamela April 2, 2009 at 9:33 am

to all of the people who are chastising this person: you are the most smug, arrogant, passive-aggressive people on the planet. take responsibility for your whiny spoiled brats when you're in a public place. especially a flight where the entire flight suffers because YOU can't assume parental responsibility and ASSUME that the rest of us love your little bastard as much as you do. grow the eff up and learn some social responsibilty…

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Poopy Knuckles December 31, 2009 at 8:01 am

Um… How can someone be passive aggressive by responding directly to the poster? Clearly the asshole who wrote this submission in the first place is passive-aggressive, seeing as they waited until AFTER the flight to say anything, and did it in the most passive and aggressive manner possible. Please look up definitions of terms before you use them.

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Kathy April 2, 2009 at 9:43 am

While it is true that whiny children can be annoying on a flight, I believe the real problem here was with the parents. Instead of paying attention to the child, they escaped by putting on earphones. This is probably how they deal with their child at home. Don't blame the child, blame the parents. Often whininess can be turned off by simply playing or distracting the child to something else.

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Beth April 2, 2009 at 9:50 am

I have three children, an infant, a two year old and a three year old. When the older two were younger, we flew a few times with them. They were both pretty good, for the most part. Our first flight was delayed (never fly american). By the time we got on the plane, my daughter was nearly asleep, but my son was getting cranky. We did our best to help him to settle down. What doesn't help a parent in this situation is rude looks and comments from other passengers.

And for you sir, to say what you said, then walk away, regardless of the parents actions during the flight was cowardly.

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Hawk July 19, 2013 at 1:47 pm

You're not paying attention to anything that has transpired here, and it seems like you aren't the only one.
The individual who posted the story isn't saying that all kids are bad, he is saying that this kid was horrible, and the parents did nothing.
Calling him cowardly is the most pointless statement I have heard yet. I praise his restraint, for I would have told them on the plane to sack up and do some proper parenting.
Your kids are probably well behaved, you probably look after them. If so, congratulations for you, I applaud you as a parent. These parents suck however, and they aren't the only ones.

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Joan June 20, 2016 at 6:53 pm

hmmmm maybe the flight was familiar and Beth was the deliquent parent…. just saying

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Caitlin April 2, 2009 at 9:55 am

Seriously. Get over it. I hope that since you have posted this, you have had time to have children of your own and realize what an ass and inconvenience you were to the parents.

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Hawk July 19, 2013 at 1:48 pm

Can you please name me just ONE way that he was an inconvenience to the parents? In any way, shape, or form? I would love to hear how you got him being an inconvenience out of that story…

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Ethernet April 2, 2009 at 9:57 am

I have 6 kids, yeah, that was a spoiled brat and the parents were worthless. True, you sometimes can't console toddler, but no effort was made to try and quiet the kid nor were there any apologies offered.

If I couldn't console one of my kids, I shure would be saying sorry a lot!

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diane April 2, 2009 at 9:57 am

I drove cross country from NJ to San Antonio TX with my 3 year old grandson, daughter and my dog. We took turns sitting with him in the back seat (he had to sit in the car seat), talking, playing, reading with him. We had toys, snacks, books, etc. We drove straight through except for a 6 hours stop-over to nap and shower. Parents needs to try to distract their kids, not just ignore them. If the parents had done everything to stop their child from whining, then that's all they could do. They could have walked him up and down the aisle, let him sit on their lap, cuddled him, whatever. But to put headphones on and ignore him, that's inexcusable.

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Travis April 2, 2009 at 10:02 am

Unbelievable! What a complete coward! If you had something to tell these parents, why run away with your tail between your legs? You're coming off a bigger whiner than the kid!

If you are going to purchase seats that are available to the general public, than you can expect to have to deal with members of the general public — as obnoxious as you think they are. Elitist snob!

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Raleighla April 2, 2009 at 10:06 am

I am a mother with a 6 yr old daughter. She's been flying since she was 9 months. NEVER A PROBLEM! The problem lies with the parents. Get some BALLS and shut these kids up. If I am ever fortunate enough to board a plane with a loud, incessant child, you better believe I will address the situation the same way I would address it if the child was mine. And if the parent doesnt like it, I'll let them have it too! The best way to keep the pressure down for children (babies and toddlers) is to have them eat. Swallowing reduces the pressure….DUH!! Why didnt your parenting magazines and mommy groups ever tell you that?!!!!

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Krystal April 2, 2009 at 10:07 am

Wow, you're an incredibly nice person, NOT! Yeah, it sucks about the kid but you're no better with your little comment at the end there pal!

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Sarah April 2, 2009 at 10:32 am

That's what's wrong with this society nowadays, where letting children misbehave is normal, and those who are upset with said children are considered intolerant. Had my sister and I EVER thrown a tantrum, whined loudly and/or incessantly, ran around, or just made general pains of ourselves, we'd have been reprimanded, had things taken away from us, or at worst, gotten a swat on the butt. When kids act like this, it is without a doubt the parents' fault.

I commend you in letting them know how rude they were to 2 entire planes full of people. Too many people take it in stride nowadays.

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David April 2, 2009 at 10:41 am

I'll take responsibility for my kids whining. Who will take responsibility for the whiny kid who wrote this note though?

Not once does the story tell me the kid didn't have good reason to be whining. There are lots of reasons to be sympathetic to whiny young toddlers, but few enough to be sympathetic to whiny adults.

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JH April 2, 2009 at 10:41 am

Maybe parents with kids who don't tolerate flying well should do what my parents always did with us, and DRIVE. There's really no good reason to force a child (and everyone else on the plane who has to listen to them) to endure a flight. I'm completely patient with kids…I love 'em. It's the parents that often make me wonder.

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Nayr April 2, 2009 at 10:43 am

wow that is pretty brave to walk by people and mumble a comment and then speed up before they can say anything back. You really showed them.

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Jacklynn April 2, 2009 at 10:47 am

I am a mother of two, and they've both flown since they were tiny, never a problem. It's not the child you should be blaming and complaining about, it's the parents. Children can be hard to handle, yes, but you should always deal with them, not just ignore them. However, dirty looks from people like you as soon as I step on a plane with my two kids doesn't make it any better of a flight.

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Joe April 2, 2009 at 10:54 am

I suspect the writer does not have a great deal of experience with children, but the parents here need to step up. The tell is "the parents … were both watching the in-flight TVs and were oblivious to the noise".

My wife and I have two children, 4 and 2 years old, and have flown with them a number of times (including cross-country). My wife (especially) and I prepare carefully for these trips. We make sure we have all our food, supplies, and other activities with us as we board the flight. We make sure they get diapers changed, and plan out mealtime/snacktime as entertainment on the plane. We make sure they get to move around in the airport before boarding, as they'll be cooped up on the plane. Once we're in flight, we work really hard to entertain them.

Finally, we do not once put on the headphones. Fact is, at this stage, we don't get to indulge in the "in-flight entertainment system". That's the deal when you're a parent; you have to show your children that sometimes you need to put other peoples' needs ahead of your own wants. Eventually, our kids will see that we modeled consideration for others in how we parent them, and hopefully they will take in those lessons.

Now at that point, if one of the kids throws a tantrum, then the writer and others have to show some sort of understanding. At times you can do everything possible, and the child still gets out of sorts. But if you make your best possible effort, I think most reasonable people will understand.

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Gem June 22, 2010 at 2:25 pm

I agree, I took my 6 month old twin sisters long haul London to LAX with my mother. We didn’t touch the inflight entertainment system as we were with the babies keeping them happy the entire time. A year later, we did the same.

Even last year when they were 6, we entertained them and only used in flight entertainment when we had to.

It was exauhsting but neccessary. Its our jobs as grown ups to look after them and stop them making a nuicence.

That said, during take off and landing when they had to be still, they did scream especially when they were babies and we couldn’t do more than comfort them. We still tried.

As a young childless adult. If I see kids being annoying, then I get annoyed with the parents, if I see parents trying to look after their kids. Then I feel sympathetic to the parents instead of annoyed.

Sometimes you have to fly with kids, my mum moved to the UK and got married, her family are all in LA. Thus driving isn’t an option, nor is expecting her entire family (some with kids themselves) to come out here to visit us.

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Anonymous April 2, 2009 at 10:58 am

Pamela and Raleighla are both dumb c***s. As a parent of a toddler, there is not much you can do to placate a toddler that is "whining" as a result of being bored or uncomfortable. A child reacting to not liking something does not make them spoiled, nor does it make somebody a bad parent for not making the "whining" go away. I can think of far worse problems to contend with than a toddler.

By the way, I am a parent of a two year old, and I hardly believe the drones on here who claim perfect behavior by their kids…nuh, uh – no effing way…

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Jenna April 2, 2009 at 10:59 am

You have no kids, do you.

You wait….your day will come.

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Anonymous April 2, 2009 at 11:03 am

No, this person clearly is not a parent. Oh mama, I would pay to see when your day with the kids on a plane comes…you ignorant a$$!

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Anonymous April 2, 2009 at 11:06 am

Sarah, you are stupid – a two year old cannot physiologically listen attentively and behave for a flight. It's impossible, and shame on many of you folks for the attitude about toddlers. Also shame to the folks that insist that their kids behave, blah, blah.

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jonasgal July 3, 2016 at 4:59 pm

Why can't they listen and behave?!!? I'm sure they're old enough to understand and comprehend things [even if they don't really want to at the moment!]

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f. shields April 2, 2009 at 11:19 am

I have 4 children and I have traveled with them since they were infants. Yes it is hard to travel with children, but when you get on that plane you have to be prepared to deal with your children and not make them everyone else's problem.

If the kids ears were hurting shame on the parents for ignoring it. You can give them food to chew or a drink.

I would not have been too pleased to have someone say that to me, but it would be deserved and they should be made aware of how offensive their child's behavior was.

Let's hope they have learned their lesson for the next time they get on a plane.

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Marlena April 2, 2009 at 11:30 am

I totally agree with the poster of this and I have kids! I flew 10 hours with a 2 year old and did everything I could to keep him occupied so he wouldn't disturb other passengers around me.

Not only was my son well behaved the other passengers around me seeing that I was trying assisted occasionally to help give me a break.

I think it is totally ignorant when parents let their kids do this and simply ignore them I guess expecting someone else to take care of it for them??

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Paul Walker April 2, 2009 at 11:33 am

Did the whiny kid publish his complaints online?

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Emily April 2, 2009 at 11:43 am

I agree with the poster. I've been on flights with 3 year olds and the parents of those kids kept them busy and quiet. Let's not act like parents don't have other options. If you have an annoying kid, DRIVE. Spare the rest of us.

Procreation is a choice. And in order to do so, you have to make sacrifices.

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jonasgal July 3, 2016 at 5:02 pm

You're right–procreation IS a definite choice and requires certain sacrifices! That's why I'm never having any kids! I don't want to make the certain sacrifices or anything! I LOVE being independent of kids and not having to worry abt them or anything either, tgoodness!
Excellent "post" by the way!

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Sarah April 2, 2009 at 11:44 am

It's farm from impossible, and if the parent does his or her job and actually PARENTS their kid, then the kid is a whole lot less likely to act up. In fact, most kids act up horrifically because they are trying to get attention that they feel they need.

Now, in a case such as Joe mentioned, if after all of the effort is put in and the kid still acts up, then the kid is just being a kid, and the parents have been doing their job.

To the lovely "Anonymous"…you quite obviously are one of those people who feel that everything your child does should be excusable on the sheer basis that your child is simply a child. While a 2 year old may not listen as well as a child who is older, they are certainly not impossible for them to listen or be distracted by the parent during a flight. To say that it is "physiologically impossible" for a 2 year old to behave on a flight is placing oneself in a victim's position by saying, "I'm not even going to try to calm my child down, because as you know, he/she is just a child."

And by the way, most people, if you really read what is being said, are not blaming the children for being children. We are, however, blaming the parents for not seeming to give a crap how their children behave.

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Anonymous April 2, 2009 at 11:56 am

you are a bitch! drive and listen to teh radio next time!

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Erik April 2, 2009 at 12:08 pm

To all the posters, (Parents) here who think it should be ok to be forced to sit though hours of whining and crying. Did you know, one of the most annoying sounds in the world is the sound of babies crying (look it up). After paying hundred of dollars like everyone else and outrageous luggage fees, sitting in a cramped chair with strangers I don’t know sleeping on me. I shouldn't have to sit and listen while your damn kid cries for hours, regardless if their ears hurt. I'm not blaming the kid, it’s not their fault. It's YOUR fault, all you selfish parents who think that just because they have children everyone else should be miserable and listen to THEIR crying babies. NEW FLASH! Not everyone else loves your whinny brat as much as you do, or at all for that matter. I have all the sympathy for this poor guy who had to endure all that noise pollution in a very small enclosed environment. Have some sense of consideration for the general public and find another way to travel if you know your precious child is going to annoy everyone for hours on end. If I’m sick I don’t travel, I don’t subject everyone on a plane to the bacteria I spew into the air. I don’t care how much you parents will sit here and tell me “oh you don’t know what its like having kids you’ll never understand”, because the bottom line is that NO ONE on that plane wants to listen to your little brat cry for hours on end, and that includes other people with kids of their own, but you wont say anything because that’s not politically correct. Its more annoying to hear that you think I should just “SUCK IT UP” and “DEAL WITH IT”, why don’t you SUCK IT UP and DRIVE!! DEAL WITH IT!!

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Geoff April 2, 2009 at 12:10 pm

I'm very impressed you said something. I would have just ignored it, despite how much it bothered me.

Big ups for telling those parents off. Children are difficult, but they shouldn't be everyone elses problem!

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RND April 2, 2009 at 12:12 pm

I re-read the story and one point puzzles me. "He kept chanting over and over. 'Noooo. Leave me alone.'"

I have a child who just turned two, perhaps he is not typical of most child – limited survery group. However, I have not observed nor can understand why would the child repeat the same sentance to be left alone – if being left alone??

That statement alone suggests that the parents were or atleast had made attempts to pacify the child. Unless of course the child was being tortured then an intervention should have occurred.

Now, perhaps there may have been other developmental issues – hard to determine from a casual observation of a young child in what can be a generally stressful situation anyway.

So, it seems to me that something is missing from the story for a complete picture.

My suggestion, offer to help. It should either embarrass the parents into doing something or perhaps they will give you the child and you can calm the child down to everyone's amazement. You obviously weren't able to do anything else other than be bothered by the child anyway.

If the parents were being willfully ignorant in their child's needs for soothing and attention then I am out of line – sorry. But the story does not actually give enough information to make that point.

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Jeff April 2, 2009 at 12:24 pm

Yeah well, you could always put an end to the tree hugger Bull*hit and knock the kid upside their head….. ya know, like parents used to be able to do. This world is a bunch of people who have no effin clue.

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RND April 2, 2009 at 12:37 pm

hmm… Jeff how's the head??

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Whiney kid April 2, 2009 at 12:37 pm

To the idiot who called two people the C word because they disagree with them, go to hell prick. I don't like to hear kids going nuts on planes either. I have seen these breeder type adults with thier trophies kids screaming for attention and adults not being parents. Ignoring your kids is not a answer and it is not responsible to put all the other PAYING customers suffer at your kids behavoir. I commend the writer of this story and I agree she was well within her right to confront these bad parents. You love your kids, Good! The rest of us have no feelings what so ever. Also for the idiots saying its in a public place, screw you. A public place does not mean everyone has the right to act out or be disruptive. There are certain expectations that are expected when your in public. One is when your in public, act like it, don't act like your at home. If your kid will not behave in a restaurant, leave. Don't fly with bad children or those that can't deal with flying. The population of the planet is 6.5 billion people, your kids is just a drop in the bucket and is your problem not the other 6.5 billion people. The fact is your spawn is your creation and its not that special. Put a cork in it or don't fly. I can't leave a flying airplane to get way from your screaming child. I think more people feal this way but know that they will get HAMMERED by other parents if they say anything about bad behavoir of children. With so many parental lacking morons posting here it is true birds of a feather fly together. Shut your kid up!

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John April 2, 2009 at 1:05 pm

I totally agree with the last post… If they could leave then this wouln't be a problem…but your confined to your seat and can't move or leave. SHUT YOUR DAMN KIDS UP or DRIVE!

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Gem June 22, 2010 at 9:31 am

What if its a transatlantic flight, and you are the one person in an extended family who lives on one side of the Atlantic? How do you drive across the Atlantic? Or do your family not deserve to see your kids until they're 20?

Sometimes there a few options.

That said, parents should look after their kids and try and entertain them, it can be done. With effort which it is the parents duty to put in.

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john April 2, 2009 at 1:08 pm

Very young children will be problematic on a flight. Parents that take them on a flight for anything other than attending a funeral are inconsiderate jerks. Get off your dead arse and rent a car.

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Agreed April 2, 2009 at 1:17 pm

Parents – if you can't control your spoiled, bratty kids at home what makes you think it will be any better when they get stir-crazy on a plane? If you can't control their whining, at least keep them from kicking the back of the airplane seats. Kids these days are overstimulated by sugar, video games and too much TV. No wonder they can't sit still and keep themselves occupied with their own imagination. They let TV and video games replace their creativity. If kids were left to themselves to read, play with Legos, draw, color or do anything else creative, the child would use his own skills to entertain himself, not whine because of boredom. Spoiled brats and spoiled clueless parents. You parents should be flogged.

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deerslayer April 2, 2009 at 1:28 pm

Children should be neither seen nor had. Case, as they say, closed. I just wish the parents of the PARENTS had had this more enlightened view.

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Erin April 2, 2009 at 1:30 pm

I have a two year old, a 12 year old and a 13 year old who has autism. Guess who the biggest jerk is when we fly? Its the guy who sits there glaring at us as my 13 year old talked about the plane, as if we we're in the wrong, God forbid we try to fly with two perfectly healthy, children and one who has mental problems on HIS flight. After all, he paid money. So did we. Our "normal" kids watched the DVD's we brought for them and dozed through the movies. My 13 year old is fascinated by planes and for him, this was the highlight of the trip. And while my two year old did whine, for a while, while he couldn't get up, no one complained about him, you know why? Cause two year olds are two year olds. He wasn't screaming at the top of his lungs, he wasn't annoying anybody.

As for my 13 year old who apparently was, he's disabled. He's mentally handicapped and it sounds to me as if this little boy on your flight was too. His parents were leaving him alone. So why don't you? Cause you know what, you bother me with your incessant staring at me like I'm a bad parent.

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John April 2, 2009 at 2:11 pm

Tell me Erin,

Is it harder to look away then to ignore screaming and crying…don’t compare staring to crying. There you women go being all selfish again, staring bugs 1 person not an entire plane full of passengers.

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ds April 2, 2009 at 2:14 pm

I used to hate kids when I flew or went out to eat. Then I had kids of my own. We bring along an endless bag of distractions, snacks, movies, whatever. I don't want my kids bothering other people. But guess what? After 5 hours in the air a two year old can lose their mind. I'm sorry if my kids has to cry himself to sleep, there isn't anything I can do about it. Bear in mind that you used to be a kid too. Grow up.

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ds April 2, 2009 at 2:20 pm

Oh, and one last thought. I may be a nice guy, but if you consider coming up to me and talking smack about my kids or my parenting after I've done my best keeping the kids in check on a 6 hour flight I will tear you a new asshole. I'm always pleasantly surprised by how nice people are to my family when we have to fly. But judging from these comments some of you figure children should be born with the manners of a 45 year old. Try Me, I dare you.

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Shawn April 2, 2009 at 2:21 pm

I wanna hear 1 comment from a guy with kids thats shares the oppinion of the majority of women here who are trying to reason why they are too lazy to drive they whinny kids…

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PAM April 2, 2009 at 2:24 pm

DS,

Great, if you can't beat'um then BEAT THEM…Nice attitude to have.. I punch what I don't want to deal with… What exapmle would you set for your kids if they watch daddy tear the guy who was having a bad day a new asshole…I bet you's make them proud of 'ol dad

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ds April 2, 2009 at 2:31 pm

It would show them to stand up to assholes who pick a fight. If you're going to walk up to a stranger and start an incident you need to be prepared for what you might get. Although I meant tear you a new asshole verbally.

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karin April 2, 2009 at 2:34 pm

I recently was on a flight and a young child (about five) had ear problems – my problem was he was kicking the back of my seat incessantly. Parents were oblivious and kept saying "oh, Oliver, how are your ears" After maybe ten minutes, I turned around and said in my best Mom voice "CUT THAT OUT" and guess what, he did….no more problems for the rest of the flight…

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ds April 2, 2009 at 2:36 pm

Shawn, we fly once a year, to see the aging grandparents on the other side of the country. It would be a 6 day drive. We keep our kids quiet on the plane. But people do need to understand that kids don't have the self control of adults. Sometimes they freak out. It sucks for the kids, the parents, and the three rows around them. Sorry. But some of the attitudes of these comments are so shitty. Every single one of you was a child once. And I'll bet none of you you the little angels you think you were.

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Shawn April 2, 2009 at 2:38 pm

Your right DS, I was a little bastard as a child, no doublt about it! and as such my mom never flew me on a plane…that and we was broke most the time

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Anonymous April 2, 2009 at 2:45 pm

Oh please- like an upset child is any different than any other annoying passenger! There have been plenty of times when I've flown and sat within a few rows of the biggest jackass who must have been speaking loud enough for the guy 10 rows behind us to hear everything he was saying. To bear such self importance must be such a burden!

I've never had any issues flying with my almost 3year old son- and he's flown with major ear infections. It's all about being attentive to your children- I would be mortified if he behaved in any way that would cause another passenger to be uncomfortable.

That being said… On the other side of that particular coin, should it ever happen- KNOW THIS- as a mother of one and one on the way- we certainly would appreciate empathy from those around us if things weren't going our way. Sometimes your child doesn't always behave, and that's a shame, but it's basic human nature. If you don't have the empathy or patience to deal with a child in coach or business class, I suggest you spend a little more and fly first class.

Otherwise, cut the family some slack! It's not like your flight is more than a few hours, and you can at least walk away when it's over. Those parents are stuck with those kids for the rest of their lives! So like I said, show some freaking empathy!!!

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Anonymous April 2, 2009 at 2:51 pm

BTW- Children are blessings. When I say "stuck with" it's more for the guy who could give a rat's ass about a family trying to travel via airplane instead of driving. When did people get so high and mighty? We were all children once, and a toddler or any kid under the age of 5 is probably going to have an episode- so deal with it and move on. Hey, I have an idea- lets behave like adults!

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Dad April 2, 2009 at 3:13 pm

Dude, you're flying on a commercial airline, probably coach. If you want a peaceful, child-free flight, get a better job, make some money and buy a personal jet – otherwise sorry man, that's how life works. We all have to share space.

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kw April 2, 2009 at 3:19 pm

What bothers me is not the child but rather the parents. They tuned out and disengaged by watching tv rather than attempting to deal with the disruptive behavior of their child. As a parents of two children, I give other parents lots of leeway. I don't mind the occasional outburst or extended bouts of crying or other behavior that I consider all part and parcel of traveling with young kids. However, their behavior tells me that this is the norm for these parents. This is the way they parent. They are unable to deal with their distressed child so they just don't. A child who whines from San Diego to Denver and from Denver to Milwaukee is not being properly attended to or parented. Parents of children with special needs or disabilities are usually keenly aware of the impact their child's behavior is having on others. They do not tune out. These parents were oblivious and that is the reason I would have found the situation intolerable. It's one thing if your child is having a rough time, and you're struggling to deal with the situation. It's another to cop out and make the entire plane deal with it. We have traveled extensively with our children from infancy on. At no time would we have tolerated this sort of situation. Don't make excuses for these parents. They are same sort who let their children run wild in restaurants and scream in hotel hallways, disrupting other guests.

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ls April 2, 2009 at 3:53 pm

If it was ear trouble, have the child eat or drink through a straw. Ear plugs are good too, and chewing gum if they're old enough is great. Also, if they're small enough they can lay down with their head in the parent's lap with their seatbelt on, that can help relax. These were the things my Mom did for me when I was younger and I have been flying since I was 6 months old. She said it definitely helped and mostly I would just whimper a little from pressure.

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Suzanne April 2, 2009 at 4:06 pm

When I flew with my four month old from Connecticut to Georgia I brought a diaper bag full of snacks and relatively quiet distractions(nothing with a battery in it!) I was so relieved that my son was happy and quiet playing with his plastic rattling key chain and crinkly plush toys. No crying or winning. Of course the plastic toys made some noise and an annoyed woman stared at me from across the aisle and said curtly, "He sure does like his toys!" Some people will aleays find something to complain about if they have to put up with the presence of others.

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bravo April 2, 2009 at 4:18 pm

Sick of parents puttting the issue of their kids bad behavior on an "intolerant childless person". Get a life.

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Briana April 2, 2009 at 4:18 pm

Why does everybody assume that a child who whines is a spoiled brat with terrible parents? You people are probably the exact same people who would call CPS on a parent who actually disciplined their child. Kids whine, even the most well behaved. It comes to a point where you can say whatever you want and do whatever you want with the child and it's not going to make a difference. So what, it would be better for the parents to constantly be shushing or worse, screaming at their child to behave? Yes everybody paid their money but understand, you are in a public place and therefore, the people around you are not subject to your every wish and whim. If it is such a huge problem do have to deal with kids then perhaps YOU should find a different form of transportation.

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ilk April 2, 2009 at 4:42 pm

"you are in a public place and therefore, the people around you are not subject to your every wish and whim."

I don't think this is a case of wanting the child or his parents to be subject to other passengers' every wish and whim. It is about trying to get along in a small, enclosed environment. It's basic societal behavior. Watching tv while your child is disrupting others for hours and hours is unconscionable.

Perhaps the child became inconsolable because the parents were too busy watching tv to head off the problem early on.

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Leset April 2, 2009 at 4:45 pm

I am a preschool teacher to 22, 3-5 year olds and for those of you who say children don't have self control are full of it! They do and in my experience it is ALWAYS the parents fault when children act out, so do us all a favor and set boundaries and guidelines for your kids. Now I am not saying that all parents with whiny kids are bad parents but I am saying that if you were a disciplined parent you would be able to control your childs' temperament! I don't think people on commercial flights would be as upset about loud cranky kids if the parents would apologize to the people around them and it is clear that this childs parents could care less about who they were inconveniencing.

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aish April 2, 2009 at 5:42 pm

Clearly, both sides of the "aisle" have valid points here. Maybe what really needs to be done is for one of the airlines to step up and offer some kind of "Family Friendly" flight or perhaps a (politically correctly worded) "No-Children" option.

Granted, there would likely be an up-charge, but that's almost expected these days, isn't it? Honestly, I'd be willing to pay a bit more to be on a child-free flight in most cases. I'm not a parent myself, but I do try to make an effort to be tolerant. I also try to avoid a situation that I know is ultimately going to annoy me, regardless of where the fault lies – bad parenting or kid being a kid.

Here's another thought: maybe some kind of option could be created with no extra charges, but by making certain flight times primarily available to "Families with Small Children". Or even by offering more varied flight times. I'd think that a lot of the time people traveling with kids don't have the flexibility to leave early or fly very late. I know I'd be happy to adjust my schedule if it meant I'd be more likely to have a relatively quiet, not-getting-kicked-in-the-back-all-flight kind of trip. Folks that fly for a living probably wouldn't have the same flex in their schedules as I do, but it's just a thought.

Regardless, reading all of these comments made 2 points vivid to me:

1. it would be nice if we all could learn to be a little more understanding/less intolerant or at least less -hateful- when we express ourselves in writing

AND

2. there are a lot of people who need to learn to spell AND use grammar appropriately and properly. I'm not trying to be an elitist snob or and I'm not talking about typos from typing too quickly. It's just that it can be hard to take a comment seriously when one can't get past the comment-poster's not being able to use "your" and "you're" correctly. (And, yes, that' MY issue to get past, I know. But sheesh…)

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Briana April 2, 2009 at 5:45 pm

Sorry Leset, but being a teacher is NOTHING like having young children of your own. I should know, I am a teacher as well as a parent of 3 children under the age of 4. Yes, SOME children have SOME self-control but it is completely unreasonable to expect them to sit still and be quiet for extended amounts of time, especially when there is a huge change in environment, social scenery, and more than likely their ears are bothering them. You have no idea if this child wasn't feeling well. I know my boys whine a LOT more than usual when they are sick. Fine the parents probably should have said more to the kid but then you also have to realize you're taking the word of someone who obviously thinks children should do nothing more than sit in a corner with their hands in their laps and their mouths closed and God forbid them being completely NORMAL intrude on his "quiet time." Why should a parent have to kiss up to and beg forgiveness from every person who thinks that it's not normal for a child to make noise and get unruly from time to time? I could understand if the kid was running up and down the aisles screaming, hitting people, or taking things and the parents were doing nothing, but the original poster is obviously nothing more than an elitist sissy and that's just sad.

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Rowan April 2, 2009 at 7:08 pm

NO NO NO… I DO NOT HAVE TO TOLERATE YOUR CHILD'S BAD BEHAVIOR! I fully understand little kids hate sitting for long periods of time and flying lends itself to all sorts of other problems trying to keep the little ones occupied. However that is NOT my problem. This is the problem of the parents. They are your responsibility. Just because you think your kids are wonderful little miracles not everyone does. You are not special because you have kids. You do not gain more rights in society because you are a mother or father. You raise the mini-u's to be polite in public. Respectful in public and if you can't stay home. Now this isn't meant for the little kids who cry during landing, I get it…It's not rude it just is…. This is targeted to those folks who let their kids run around the boarding area, kick the seat in front of them over and over, and cry, scream, or make that high shill noise incessantly.

I don't have 'em. Don't like 'em. And don't want 'em. You want them? Then take care of them.

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Dixie Ann April 2, 2009 at 8:35 pm

To Kevin and all others who use the excuse of cabin pressure to allow their kids to cry and whine on airplanes.

Babies' pacifiers or sucking on a bottle will relieve pressure. For young kids, suckers or gum will work. There is also the idea of TEACHING kids to yawn if their ears hurt.

I know this…and I don't even have any kids! It's pretty much common knowledge.

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DDL April 2, 2009 at 10:19 pm

It's called Benadryl people, c'mon! Or NyQuil. Either one. If your kid is a brat, tired, sick, cranky or just had enough, please keep in mind WE didn't pop the little monster out so WE shouldn't have to deal with it.

Had the parents shown even the vaguest attempt to soothe the kid I bet the writer would have been less angry.

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alyxzandra April 2, 2009 at 10:30 pm

My fiance and I will be traveling to the U.S. from the U.K. next month with our 8 month old son. One thing I could never stand is a consistently crying child especially when I am cooped up on a long flight. However, before I had my son, I was also tolerant. Some children are too young to understand and you can do all the placating you want, but it does not always work. To be prepared, we plan on bringing bottles, drinks, snacks, toys, etc. And we are hoping the trip will go smoothly. But, we are also responsive to our son's needs. It sounds like these parents did not give a shit.

What it seems to me in this situation is that the parents completely ignored their child. And because he was being ignored, he let it be known he was not happy in the best way he knew how. For the parents to just put on their headphones and pretend like he is not there is the height of rudeness.

My only question is why didn't you say something during the flight?

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Missy April 3, 2009 at 12:11 am

My two year old daughter has flown 25 times in her life – transatlantic flights. We live in Europe & my family lives the U.S. I usually am alone with my daughter. I cannot tell you how stressful these flights are for me. I spend weeks preparing, so that she will be entertained and well-behaved.

Guess what, I spend 9 + hours on eggshells trying to anticipate her cries and discomfort. I understand that other travellers don't want to listen to a baby's cries, but you can not say that the parents are doing nothing to stop them. By the end of these trips, I am so physically & mentally exhausted – usually in tears at some point during the flight, have maybe gone to the bathroom once or twice – with the baby balanced on my knees. If I am lucky, I eat a little bit of something.

Maybe instead of bitching, moaning & glaring, you could offer to help a mother out. I have even pulled heavy luggage off the baggage carousel with her strapped to me in a Baby Bjorn. No one offers to help, but everyone stares.

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Shakti April 3, 2009 at 1:20 am

Maybe the kid was autistic, but yes, I have been tortured by kids screaming the entire flight, or misbehaving otherwise. I love kids, but in close confines, sometimes sitting on the tarmac or circling for hours with the same kid screaming and screaming, it wears you down. I must admit, sometimes I wish I could get an non kid flight.

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ceci April 3, 2009 at 1:34 am

You can't give Benadryl (or any antihistimine) to a 2 year old. If you were a parent (or even an aunt or uncle, you would know that). Both the commenter and the Benadryl advocate remind me of that asshole stewardess that kicked the kid off the plane for saying "bye bye" over and over. Maybe YOU child haters should take Benadryl (or better yet, Valium).

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ceci April 3, 2009 at 1:37 am

And Rowan — you were once a child (and evidently still are). Did your parents take that attitude toward you?

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Jill April 3, 2009 at 7:13 am

In response to Missy, I think the reasons why people stare and not help is either because they are scared of people getting the wrong impression and some people are just plain mean and selfish.

To the guy who wrote the post about the whiny kid, I am sympathetic. However, you are lucky those parents didn't have a gun or any weapon on hand when you rudely gave unwarranted advice.

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oh please April 3, 2009 at 7:52 am

I am reposting this peron's response becuase it is EXACTLY what I want to express:

" to all of the people who are chastising this person: you are the most smug, arrogant, passive-aggressive people on the planet. take responsibility for your whiny spoiled brats when you're in a public place. especially a flight where the entire flight suffers because YOU can't assume parental responsibility and ASSUME that the rest of us love your little bastard as much as you do. grow the eff up and learn some social responsibilty…"

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Steven Anderson April 3, 2009 at 8:48 am

This is not just a problem of kids like this on the plane it is an indication of how society lets these kids become monsters and rule the roost. What happened to discipline and respect for others. My dad would smacked so hard that eyes would spin if I had pulled that kind of cry baby BS and then would have told me, "NOW you have something to whine about." Maybe a Bill should be introduced whereby other responsible parents can parent a child like this if the biological parents are obviously unable to do so. Why have kids if you don't know even the bare basics of how to take care of them?

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Beavis Comeavis April 3, 2009 at 11:23 am

Kids vary. Some are worse than others in terms of disruption and annoyance. From the exact description in this story, it sounds like the parents made zero effort to calm the kid or to help distract him. There are some things you can do to at least mitigate the situation. Ignoring the kid is not always the best option.

However, the ppl's comment on here that are saying the parents should have done something and they were awful and how dare they, and all that… it's true sometimes little kids like this really cannot be calmed down for any great length of time. When you have kids, you'll learn.

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Dan April 3, 2009 at 12:31 pm

I am sick of all of the people saying this is ok. When I was a kid, traveling and going out to restaurants and such was a priviledge. If we whined or acted out that was the end of that and we knew it because my parents followed through. My wife's family was the same way. If your kids can't behave on a flight or at a restaurant or anywhere else in public then they don't get to do fun things. They will eventually learn that they need to behave a certain way in public. Enough already, take responsibility people.

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jonasgal July 3, 2016 at 5:21 pm

KUDOS [caps for emphasis, not for shouting at you!] to your parents for "following through" with their discipline! Your "post" is excellent! Thank you for sharing your opinion[s]!

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AL April 3, 2009 at 1:28 pm

You know what.. this is not a people with kids world. That's what I find so frustrating all the time is society EXPECTS everyone to pander to kids and parents that have kids. I say FUCK THAT SHIT. Start an adult only airline for example. have your "disney flights" where you can let parents and their brats roam free where they want and scream, and whine and everything..

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Rushty April 3, 2009 at 1:37 pm

I think that whole last paragraph was BS.

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Anonymous April 3, 2009 at 1:59 pm

I can't even read this anymore- for all you people who can't stand to be around kids on their bad days- parents fault or not- buy a freaking first class ticket and stop your bitching! Yes, in some or most cases it's the parent's fault- but chances are you won't find any kids riding up there in the more expensive seats. Know that your crappy attitude doesn't help the situation, and neither does letting it get to you to the point you're so upset. There are more important things in life than sitting around bitching about the toddler who was a pain on the flight. We've all been there- I've never felt the need to complain about it. It's a fact of life.

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Rowan April 3, 2009 at 8:12 pm

Hey Cici, My mother died giving birth to me and my father was killed in Vietnam…. So I don't know what attitude they would have had with me.

That, however, is not the point. These points that are being made are valid. Air travel is a necessary evil not easily avoided. If you read my post, all of it, my complaint is with those parents, looks like you are one of them, who feel it is ok to let their offspring run around the plane, kick the seat over and over, scream, yell, through pretzels or chips at their siblings, and the parents just ignore all this because, as someone above said, "it is completely unreasonable to expect them to sit still and be quiet for extended amounts of time."

Well I think it is reasonable to expect parents to parent their kids. And parenting includes monitoring their behavior. I find this hard to believe that parents actually expect fellow passengers to put with their children's bad behavior!!!

And Cici…. given your choice of adjective in describing a flight attendant, I can easily infer the type of example your kids are following!

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Anonymous April 4, 2009 at 4:14 am

No child should be whining that long. And he was probably doing it because the parents were ignoring him.

I would have said something too. Reasonable disturbance is tolerable but for hours on end? Nope. The parents deserved the chastising.

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Aidan April 4, 2009 at 10:50 am

I think this article shows the poster's impatience and lack of understanding. Granted it isn't a pleasant experience, but the child is only 2 or 3 years old and cannot always be placated on flights… especially if they are sick,or the pressure bothers their ears. The parents were probably standing with their mouths open after your insult because the were amazed at your ignorance and arrogance.

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sarak April 4, 2009 at 11:07 am

Having a child is a CHOICE. Why should this traveler have to be considerate of two other people's CHOICE? If you don't know how to shut your Choice up, then don't fly. Drive in your own car where no one else other than you has to listen to your shitty kid whine. Why should other people have to suffer?

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Missy April 4, 2009 at 12:25 pm

Wow. I'm appalled at how many nasty people are out there. If you live lives with so much hatred and scorn in your hearts, then I believe you deserve to be "tortured" by someone elses "Choice". I'm sure all areas of your lives are miserable, not just your traveling experiences. Why don't you go watch Charles Dickens' " A Christmas Carol" and learn something.

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Private Porksword April 4, 2009 at 8:55 pm

Tavi you are my hero!!! Thanks for saying what you did! You must be a far better mother than some of these other mutts….

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Billllll April 5, 2009 at 12:21 am

shut that kid up.

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alyxzandra April 5, 2009 at 12:24 am

Sarak, you are being rude and offensive by referring to a child as a CHOICE. But, some people do not have any social skills. Maybe you should drive instead of fly so others do not have to suffer with your social deficit.

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jonasgal July 3, 2016 at 5:26 pm

Well, having children IS a CHOICE! Otherwise I'D be extremely miserable, worried, and unhappy if people DIDN'T have a CHOICE as to whether or not to become parents of someone!
They're not socially deficit just because it's the truth!

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petpad April 5, 2009 at 3:24 am

A little whining, a little attention, there IS an acceptable middle ground where parents do pay attention to their children, and stangers will understand and tolerate for a while. I've been on both sides of that fence many times. That threshold seems to have been crossed and in this case, without the benefit of hearing both sides of the story, the complainer wins the cause : those ear-plugged parents should have done more.

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Louis Black April 5, 2009 at 3:42 am

These parents need to beat the ass of these kids and they would shut up. A good hard pinch is enough to shut up a normal idiot child above the age of 2. These dumb parents just squirt these kids out and expect everyone else to smile and put up with the kids bad behavior NOT.

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A. H. Stuart April 5, 2009 at 4:22 am

Why is it that people with children often expect those without to subsidize their child-rearing efforts with their own time and sanity? The decision to raise a family comes with life-altering consequences and obligations. Having children *does not* exempt you from basic standards of civilized behavior– namely, consideration and responsibility. The number and age of the children in this instance is irrelevant. Clearly the parents have no regard for others beyond their own needs and comforts

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FlyingParent April 5, 2009 at 5:08 am

Petpal seems to have the right attitude about this. I can't see where anyone was absolutely right or absolutely wrong. Clearly the parents were choosing to escape from their parental responsibility. (maybe they thought "giving in" and entertaining him was poor pavlovian training)

On the other hand, waiting until the terminus of the flights was the wrong time to address the parents. At the very least, at the beginning of the second flight, knowing what to expect, the traveler should have asked if there was something he could do to placate the child "hint, hint!"

I've had my three kids fly with me frequently. Usually no problem. However ear infections do happen and are tough to deal with. If other passengers see you trying to deal with and placate your child, they have no choice but to understand.

If you have no tolerance for disturbance at all, perhaps it is you who should drive. Then you are in complete control of your environment. Unless you paid for the first class seating, you should expect to deal with a coach lifestyle.

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SamH April 5, 2009 at 4:26 pm

If you are stupid enough to pick a fight or use violence on a plane, then don't be surprised if the police are waiting for you at your destination. I would even pay money to hear some idiot explain why he or she felt it necessary to go ballistic because their own child exhibited bratty behavior. The kids learn from their parents, and if the parents are assholes–so are the kids.

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Alysa April 6, 2009 at 7:38 am

Honestly, people need to start taking responsibility for their kids and realize that the world does not revolve around them. I am a mother of 4 boys and would never expect other people to put up with my kid's whining. When you travel, be prepared. Have toys available… hell, even bring candy to keep your kid quiet. When you travel with a toddler, everyone knows that you are supposed to give them motrin before the flight to help with their ears. Benadryl helps with this as well (and helps get them to sleep). Get a clue people!

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Alysa April 6, 2009 at 7:44 am

Oh, and to the person who said you can't give Benadryl to a two year old… WRONG. My pediatrician advised me to give my child Benadryl before the age of two for allergies.

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Amber May 19, 2016 at 11:01 am

Pretty sure the bottles say not to give to under 2 without the consultation of a doctor. That means you speak with your doctor and they can determine if it would be safe for your child. You do not simply give drugs to children without taking the time to speak with their doctor, not everyone can take every drug without incident.

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Jenn April 7, 2009 at 6:37 am

Get over it people. What would you like the parents to do? They are probably just as uncomfortable with it as you are. It's not like you can take the child in the other room or something. You are in a confined space. And asking a parent to give a child medicine for a nonmedical issue is absurd and potentially dangerous!

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me April 8, 2009 at 2:42 am

Alysa,

Your stupidity is astounding.

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Raleighla April 8, 2009 at 5:47 am

I'm not a c*** b/c I don't want to listen to your crying ass child throughout my flight. As previously stated I AM A MOTHER of a child who's been flying across country twice a month since she was 9 months. What happen to the parents who could look at a child and scare the shit out of them cause the kid knew if he/she made another peep- All hell was about to break loose? It's not being mean-it's called PARENTING! Tough decisions. You're not always gonna be the good guy. YOU CAN'T BE THEIR FRIEND!!!!! These are probably the same "parents" who have a woman come to their house and teaches them how to discipline their own kids…You guys are a fucking discrace!

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Joe Mama April 8, 2009 at 6:31 am

One thing that gets me about all these comments is that some people seem to get all offended because others don't want to listen to their child whine & cry. It seems that some can't take any criticism of other's parenting skill (or lack of), and any hint that someone isn't being a good parent is saying that you hate children. Parenting isn't an easy job, but people who just don't try are the ones who most people are pissed off at.

Yes, if you have a child, it's your responsibility to parent them. I understand that it's hard to keep a child from fussing, but you have to at least try.

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Curtis April 8, 2009 at 11:14 am

Parents – Prepare before the flight, books, snacks, coloring book, a small DVD player (depending on the length of the flight)

Passengers – Be understanding to the kids and Parents. Most Parents have been single and have had to listen to children misbehaving on an airplane trip, so the Parents know how un-nerving this can be and "most" parents try their best to keep their children, engaged over the period of the flight.

Oh and Bad Parents are Bad Parents, in their home, on an airplane, at work, and there is not much we as "standbyers" can do about it.

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Paul April 9, 2009 at 6:17 pm

when i was little – similar situation, i was being loud and someone told me what you told the kid on the plane. my dad got up and stood up for me and told the other person dont ever treat a child like that. me, on the other hand, ouch. i got a spanking

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Alysa April 9, 2009 at 6:47 pm

Me,

As is your maturity level. If you disagree with something I said, then just say so instead of acting like a ballsy three year old who can type.

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Alysa April 9, 2009 at 6:57 pm

Jenn,

Use common sense… we aren't talking about giving a child Benadryl for non-medical reasons on a regular basis. If the pediatrician says it's okay (and I got the okay for a flight), then I will take my doctors advice over you, thanks. I do agree that many times the parents are stressed about the situation as well. The unfortunate fact is that this is not always the case. Those parents are the inspiration for this thread.

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devon April 11, 2009 at 9:31 am

that sucks- As a parent I'd be pretty embarrased. I'd bet a lot of money that if you saw that same family in a store he'd be whining for toys, candy, etc..until he got his way.

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rah April 13, 2009 at 1:40 pm

I rather sit near a whiney kid than a fat gassy grownup!

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GetReal April 13, 2009 at 3:47 pm

I'm so sick and tired of people making excuses for badly behaved children. "Oh, their poor ears", "aww, but they had to sit still for a couple of hours". Screw that! Teach your kids to behave and when they whine…TELL THEM TO STOP!

Gah, parents today are the ones who need the swift kick in the ass, not the kids. "don't tell little johnny to stop screaming, he's 'expressing' himself!"

That is all.

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Stephanie in Minneap April 16, 2009 at 8:09 am

As a child of a Marine, we were expected to be seen and not heard, say please and thank you, and if we got out of hand we knew punishment awaited. Our parents never raised a hand to us, but if we started in my father or mother would just look at us and say knock it off. As the eldest of three who have been on planes since the age of 6, even trips to Europe and Australia, we never got out of hand on a plane. And I am only 30 so no old generation upbringing.

Why can't parents control thier children anymore?

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Sarah April 16, 2009 at 10:01 am

What I find disturbing is the chanting of "Nooooo. Leave me alone." The first thing that came to mind was, "Oh my God, this child has been sexually abused."

And considering the parents' lack of interest in the well-being of their child, I would not be surprised.

However, having to listen to that would have driven me up the wall. To all you travellers out there, check out the Bose headphones!

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Amit April 16, 2009 at 10:26 am

Awful parents for ignoring the problem. I can't believe people are defending them. The OP was within his/her rights to say that and walk away; it's not being cowardly, it's called being pissed off and being "done" with the situation. A kid should be quiet within minutes of a tantrum like that. No excuse.

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tom April 25, 2009 at 5:39 am

Now if a child is know to have ear pain when flying, isn't it neglect by putting them on a plane?

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Anony May 5, 2009 at 12:13 pm

Your behavior was worse than the kids'. for all you know he may be handicapped, maybe his first time flying, maybe he was scared. People like you who have no tolerance for anything different should go live on some island all alone.

what good did telling that cpl off do to you? You are never going to see them again. You may have ended up hurting them just because 5 hrs of your life, which seems to be really miserable, since you feel the need to say something like that to someone to feel good about yourself and then write about it wasn't perfect.

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Laura Cardwell May 27, 2009 at 8:00 pm

I can't believe the amount of apologist bullshit people are posting here. It may be unavoidable to make your child sit silently on a plane, but there is nothing admirable about making excuses for whining. Children who whine should be denied everything they ask for until they learn that whining will earn them nothing.

Crying out of distress and whining are entirely different things, and while it may sound harsh to tell the parents so, someone needs to let them know that their little angel is not loved or appreciated by everyone else.

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Atari May 31, 2009 at 6:44 pm

"Two and three years old children do not have the capacity for empathy nor can they be reason with on any meaningful level. "

That is an excuse, and a lame one, at that.

My sister, at about two or three, was crying and crying and crying and would NOT stop. And she was crying for NO reason.

My father entered the room, popped her moderately on the leg, and told her to stop.

She stopped, and remained quiet for a long while.

Pain gets through to kids. It doesn't 'traumatize' them.

It says, "If I do that again, then I'll be spanked; ergo, don't do it again."

All of this, "Oh, I can't control him!" mentality is making for some pretty CRUDDY children.

Also, people who think that NOT having kids means that you cannot POSSIBLY comprehend how a child works; all of you people are complete morons.

I don't have to have a wife, and have her give birth to my child in order to see that they exist, and to deal with them all of the time in many different scenarios.

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mags July 22, 2009 at 9:30 pm

WOW!

My mom used to take the 4 of us kids to Europe every summer, we knew it was a treat and we KNEW bad behavior would not be tolerated.

Actually, my folks were kind of savvy, as opposed to today's parents, and started raising us to behave from the get go. All it took was a look from Mom or Dad and we knew what was what!

I don't hate kids and often interact with them in supermarket check-out lanes, restaurants, planes, trains etc. it’s fun getting a kid to giggle. I also have no qualms whatsoever about telling kids that something they're doing is not 'nice'! I've gotten looks from parents who weren't doing their jobs but that's about the extent of it.

BTW I currently live in Europe where children are granted much more free reign to be as obnoxious as they want. In the country I live in it is perfectly normal to hear parents use the words [i](Bitte schatzi)[/i] 'PLEASE, honey', clearly giving the child a choice, followed by put down the knife OR stop kicking the pigeons.

Somehow, somewhere someone decided kids are naturally loud & aggressive and the world should have to live with it. When did that happen and why were the rest of us not consulted?

These are the people who will be deciding my fate in my old age *SHUDDER*

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youmakemesick October 6, 2009 at 5:39 am

Pretty much everyone who made the comment "omg, you don't have children" or "I can't wait for you to know what it is like to be a parent" should just go ahead and drop into a grave. It is completely unreasonable for those parents to think that they cannot handle or control the behavior of a toddler. You are all sorry excuses for parents and as adults; allowing children to behave as they do even at such a young age is the beginning for raising irresponsible and selfish human beings. Why don't YOU grow a pair and realize how rude you are being to 300 other passengers as opposed to one person being rude to you.

I don't condone how the author dealt with the situation, he was just as rude with his comment, but his rudeness no way justifies the behavior of the whining child and of the parents who did nothing. If a parent had made any effort to quiet down the child, I am sure there would have been some positive results; and don't even think of trying to say that toddlers can't be controlled. Just stop sucking as a parent. Thanks.

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Brianne December 3, 2009 at 9:51 am

This is one of the many reasons I plan on not having children.

There is NO excuse for this type of behavior. The kid either needs a beating for acting out, or the parents should keep their legs closed and never have children in the first place if they cannot discipline them properly.

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Optics December 23, 2009 at 10:42 am

I think the guy did a damn nice job. Not losing it on the plane, and only giving the parents a parting Shot across the bow seemed good to me. The parents seemed very lazy in this case and what ever bitching and moaning they got from other passangers seems pretty much par for the course.

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Scaredoftakeoffs February 1, 2010 at 10:23 pm

While a 2-3 year old kid cannot and should not be totally silent 24/7, letting the kid whine is totally uncool and unnecessary.

It is not society's fault that those parents neglected to use birth control…

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MF February 2, 2010 at 5:58 am

I fully sypmapthise- and fuck all the self-righteous c***s who say otherwise.

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rerere February 27, 2010 at 12:13 pm

Glad I was never a child.

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J. Harper March 10, 2010 at 10:50 am

I was a kid, and I listened to my parents. If I didn't, I would get spanked. I was rarely spanked, because I'm a quick learner.

It was very rude of the parents to not even try to do something about their kid's whining. If the kid was in pain, try water or gum… try something. I remember being in lots of pain on a flight as a child, but my parents trying to help me was enough of a distraction that I didn't make a big fuss about it.

Sure, that kid was more than likely going to be just fine, but even if the parents knew that, they shouldn't have just ignored the kid. My parents were attentive, which is why I turned out well enough. Make excuses all you want, but those parents just didn't care enough about their kid or the other passengers. Sure, my parents would ignore me if I was asking, "are we there yet?" a million times just to annoy them, but that's far different from, "my ears hurt."

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Sue April 8, 2010 at 4:44 am

As many stated before me – I think the problem is never the child but always the parents. If a child really is in pain there are things to be done against it (e. g. eating, drinking). I also hate it if people give us bad looks when my child is crying; but on the other hand I myself cannot stand parents who do not even try to control their child. In my personal experience 2-3 year old children can very well understand when they are told to stop something. And the best way to stop is to distract anyway – with playing or some cuddling; not to sit by and put earplugs in! The method of "ignore and it will stop" might be o.k. at home but never at the cost of other people. In the long term this will result in a rude child (just as rude as its parents), and the older the less cute and the more annoying they become. But if something like this happens to me I speak up right away; I definitely don't wait for 5 hrs and then put in a comment and run…

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Bob May 11, 2010 at 8:37 am

Most of the time a whiney brat is the result of a lazy a**hole for a "parent" I flew countless times with my daughters and they were as well behaved as they were expected to be and that usually entailed non stop attention from me or my wife for the duration of the flight. Not a big deal when you are considerate of the other passengers and your own children. Now that was twenty years ago and we were average people so if we had it to do over we would probably stop by the lounge and get trashed before boarding the flight and forget about changing a diaper or paying attention to our children- that is what the other passengers are for ! we would simply watch a video or pass out and drool for the entire flight while showing no consideration for our fellow passengers or flight crew , just like so many "modern parents"do. After all todays "free range " children deserve nothing less than total freedom to make anyone within earshot miserable and to hell with anyone who has a problem with that.

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Alison November 5, 2010 at 8:17 pm

Oh please. I have been kicked by two year olds on planes and I'm not as pissy as this guy. Kids are kids, the plane hurts their ears. Kids are basically narcissists for their first few years of life – literally proven by experiments that show kids under 5 have trouble understanding other's perspectives. Also, when a kid is cycling, sometimes there is literally nothing you can do to get them to calm down. Yelling (or god forbid, hitting) will only make it worse. There are a lot of bad parents out there, but I can't believe the vitriol thrown at "breeders" on this site. Did you ever ask if you could talk to him? Sometimes having a third party the kid doesn't know saying "hi" helps, because a kid will calm down for a stranger when they are overstimulated by mom and dad.

I do not have kids (my dad's a pediatrician so I've spent a lot of time around developmentally disabled children), but I understand that I'm the grown-up in the situation. What's you guys excuses for acting like 5 year olds?

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Nicole June 17, 2011 at 7:14 pm

The parents just tuned the kid out and let everyone around them be disturbed by it. THAT is what would annoy me. Yes young children can’t express themselves well, but that doesn’t excuse the poor parenting. They could have at least tried to shut the brat up. Funny how people are often expected to sedate their pets, I often wish it was a requirement to sedate children while traveling. I have two kids, and I would never allow them to act out like that without consequences or at least trying to do something about it. I’ve dealt with parents like that before while travelling many times, and have asked the stewardess to move my seat to a quieter area loudly enough so that the offending negligent parents could hear. I’ve also ranted on my cell phone to friends once off the plane where the idiots could hear me. If they were offended I didn’t care since they bothered me during my whole flight. Have some basic courtesy for people around you.

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lnelson1218 July 26, 2011 at 10:03 am

Granted this original post was from awhile ago, but still it could have happened yesterday. For me, I understand that little kids get bored, ears hurt, etc. They are kids and some can expressed themsleves better than other. However, it is the parents responsibility to try to maintain a bit of order.
Yes, there will always be some jerk who is avoided that the child is even on the same flight as he/she is regardless of the child's behavior. However, if the parent is truly trying to keep the child quiet/amused/etc, the majority will be understanding.
For example, on one trip my uncle sat across from a woman with a baby. Not quite walking, but older than a newborn. The poor Mom was doing her best to keep the child entertained. but the baby was hand full. This was an overseas flight, so the flight probably was at least 7 hours. My uncle offered to take the child for a few minutes. The woman was very grateful and the baby was fascinated by my uncle bread and stayed quiet while being held.

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Jendakel July 14, 2012 at 10:45 am

They should have left the little whiner at home!!

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Thi Halpern January 2, 2013 at 3:24 pm

I'm not all that sympathetic to this whining flier. By that, I mean the adult who snarked that comment at the baggage carousel. It's very likely if the parents could have shut their child up, they would. The FA telling the parents to get the kid to shut-up won't do anything. Yes, FAs have authority but they cannot physically stop the child from whining unless you think putting a plastic bag over the kid's head and suffocating the child is a solution.

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Dennie Frankey April 6, 2013 at 3:43 pm

Easy peasy. Just fill the little tykes up with Nyquil and pleasant travels.

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Stories April 23, 2013 at 11:28 pm

Adults go underground with their whinings: In the internet with fictitious names

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boydboy April 26, 2014 at 7:40 am

Wow so you just ran up to the parents and whined to them and ran away?? Really mature. I fly at least 2-4 times per month so I've seen it all. I know how annoying some kids can be on flights and I also wish their parents tried to restrain them more. But you were the one who was immature. First of all it sounds like you aren't an experienced flyer because everyone knows you should carry noise-cancelling headphones or earplugs in your flight kit. So not having those was your fault. Second, running up to someone and whining to them and then running away is just weak and cowardly. If I were those parents I would have laughed at how ridiculous you looked.

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Amber May 19, 2016 at 10:59 am

Yes the parents should have done whatever they could to stop the whining. That being said, making a comment after the fact then high-tailing it out of there is pathetic and cowardice. If you have the balls to make passive aggressive statements then you need to learn how to request parents do something about their child while the problem is occurring. Also, you're on a plane, if you opt to not bring headphones you have to deal with any and all noises around you, your fault for not speaking up and also not bringing headphones.

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