From the category archives:

Senior Stories

Last summer a friend and I were on an Alitalia flight (Boeing 747) from Milan to London. Passengers were boarding and we took our seats in the emergency overwing exit row (I am quite tall and had asked for these seats). Across the aisle from us, in the two seats closest to the emergency overwing exit on the other side, sat an elderly couple.

After the doors had been closed and while the captain was making the preflight announcements, I noticed that the old lady across the aisle had taken off her jacket and had attempted to hang it up on what she assumed to be a coat hook, but what in fact turned out the be the door handle for the emergency overwing door. The door came away from its hinges and fell inwards on her lap. Rather than alert the staff, she surreptitiously tried to push the door back into place. By this time, another passenger sitting in the aisle seat next to the elderly couple became very upset. She had noticed the old lady trying to push the door back into place and summoned the purser. He was very annoyed and disappeared into the cockpit.

The plane was halted and the the purser appeared with the captain. They both fiddled with the door and pushed it back shut. The captain then proceeded to talk to everyone who had seen the incident and explained to us that the door was manufactured to enable it to come away easily. He assured us all that the pressure in the cabin would create a seal that secured the door in place. We were all much relieved, but quite a few people watched the door with a hawk’s eye for the remainder of the flight.

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Grumpy Lady

February 24, 2010

in Senior Stories

I was recently traveling in a large group on a late night flight from Miami to Boston. Being a savvy traveler, I had changed my seats online, separating myself from the rest of the group.

After about an hour and a half of delays and annoying gate agents, all the passengers boarded the aircraft. I was 2 or 3 rows behind the rest of my group, sitting in an aisle “D” seat. Soon after takeoff, I could see that another passenger was feeling uneasy sitting next to members of my group. I offered to switch with her, and she was delighted! I dragged my two carry-on bags, waking up some passengers, to her aisle seat (this is a key fact of the story).

About 3 minutes later, I hear an extremely loud voice resonating from a couple of rows behind me: “This seat is HAAARRRIBAAALLLL!!! I can’t even see the movie.” The movie was Marley & Me, the lady was about 60.

I offered to switch back with her, and surprisingly she was willing to sit next to the very same passengers who were annoying her in the first place. As I passed her in the aisle she started explaining to me that the seat was horrible, incorrectly placed, tight, etc, etc etc and that she couldn’t fit. It was the exact same aisle seat as hers, except 2 rows back!

Later, the people I was sitting with told me that this passenger had snored and fallen asleep on one of their shoulders. What a grumpy lady!?

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My husband, three kids and I were traveling from Brussels to Chicago around Thanksgiving 2006 on emergency leave as my father was dying. In fact, they were just waiting for us to arrive before they “pulled the plug.” So, already a miserable trip.

Unfortunately, our newly potty trained little one peed his pants. I had packed so quickly that I had no extra clothes for him. So, we’re trying our best to get his clothes dried up. Meanwhile, some old white haired bitch proceeds to give us a ration of shit about it – accusing us of changing a poopy diaper at our seat (which we most definitely did not do). She calls a FA and complains, talks loudly about this on and on. Just horrible.

Then, as we’re leaving the plane, she shoves our oldest daughter. At the baggage carousel I confronted her about touching my kid. Almost kicked a 75 year old woman’s ass – but managed to control my rage only because we still had to clear customs and catch another plane to get to my family. But I did manage to scream at her and call her a WHORE. That made me feel a little better. I nearly got a standing ovation from her travel mates who didn’t think so much of her either – as she had nagged them about everything during their trip.

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In February I was flying from LAX to Miami on AA when they announced that we had to stop at El Paso, TX, because of engine problems. We landed safely and were told that they were going to make some repairs and that we should be on our way ASAP. However, we stopped 20 or 30 yards before the gate. So, we were trapped inside.

I was sitting on 25D on a 767. An old lady sitting on 26A was having some incontinence problems (number 2s) and soon that area of the cabin got quite smelly. Every 20 minutes or so, with her husband’s help, she had to go to the restroom to get cleaned. We were there for 3 1/2 hours! The poor lady needed to have access to a better restroom at the terminal. The flight attendants did the best they could to eliminate the foul odor to little avail. We all would have been a lot more comfortable waiting at the terminal… just a few yards away!

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Scolded For Showing Skin

December 23, 2009 Senior Stories

I was flying on an 8 hour flight from Boston to Frankfurt to start a semester abroad in Germany. I had the window, and next to me two little old ladies sat next to me. I was feeling pretty lucky cause they didn’t smell bad, or take up my seat, and kept to themselves.
It was [...]

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Grumpy Old Man

December 5, 2009 Senior Stories

Recently on an overbooked flight from Atlanta to Milwaukee my spouse and I were assigned separate seating. The gentleman to my left and I struck up a conversation discussing his life and mine, trips, foreign languages, etc.
About 30 minutes before landing, the man to my right pulled off his Bose noise reduction headphones, turned to [...]

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Grandma Is Stuck In Dallas With No Luggage

November 25, 2009 Senior Stories

Well, this story takes place on a trip from El Paso, TX through Dallas/Fort Worth and then on to Dulles, VA. The trip out to Virginia was fine. No problems whatsoever. The way back however is a different story. I was meeting my 76 year old grandma in Dallas/Fort Worth. Well to begin with, I [...]

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Seatmates Bend Traveler’s Ear

November 8, 2009 Senior Stories

I apparently have one of those faces where, no matter the situation, people feel the need to talk to me. I hear whole life stories.
I was flying from Providence, RI to Baltimore, MD. The plane, after landing in Baltimore, was then going to continue to Florida. An elderly couple sits next to me (I had [...]

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Haunted By Passenger’s Public Potty Time

October 22, 2009 Senior Stories

I once boarded a flight from Minneapolis to Phoenix a few years ago… this was on an airline that did assigned seating. I ended up somehow sitting between a very elderly French couple. I gladly tried to trade seats with one of them so they could sit together except that not only did the stewardess [...]

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A Passenger’s Final Departure

September 24, 2009 Senior Stories

I was flying from Cyprus to Frankfurt, Germany on Cyprus Air. An elderly Greek woman had been in the boarding area and was struggling with a suitcase and many helpful people assisted her and I was impressed with the European people’s kindness and respect of this elderly woman.
I was seated in my window seat in [...]

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