Play Pen Flight

May 4, 2010

in Baby & Kid Stories

I was in an aisle seat flying from Washington DC to San Jose, California, but unexpectedly found myself in a toddler playpen for 5 hours. This flight had a large number of toddlers and young parents. Soon after take off, toddlers started wandering up and down the aisles (with Moms), discovering and visiting all their new best friends. I mean, wow, kids in front of me, beside me, behind me for many aisles.

OK, lots of my friends have kids and I know it’s not going to be easy or perfect flying across country, so I start reading. But soon, toys are being shared, toddlers excitedly want to show their new friends their toys, every kid in the plane is playing with each other. The parents think it’s cute, but it’s getting kind of annoying.

Then one young mother in the aisle seat across and one up from me, puts a blanket on floor, spreads out toys for the increasingly excited group of young kids, AND GETS DOWN ON HER HANDS AND KNEES AND STARTS PLAYING WITH THEM LIKE SHE IS 3 YEARS OLD! Her behind is sticking up 5 inches from my face and I’m thinking, “I paid $500+ to fly in a play pen?”

Eventually I get up to use the restroom in the back of the plane and hang out for awhile. When I return to my seat, the play pen has enlarged and Mom-on-her-Knees is now blocking my seat. I say excuse me and she barely moves. I step over her and we indeed bump. She exclaims, “Excuse me!” meaning “I should say excuse me.” I say nothing and sit back down for an up close and personal view of her polyester clad butt as she talks baby talk with the kids. I think she needed a babysitter herself.

I have no idea why the flight crew let this carry on in the aisles. I think they either thought it was cute or that there were too many kids on the flight to try to do anything about it. But, to this day, I’ll never forget my play pen flight.

{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Good King Herod May 5, 2010 at 2:11 am

You were obviously on the "kinder-sheist" flight.

Or on Romper Room airlines.


Clare May 5, 2010 at 7:28 am

I'm Miss Nancy

Fly Me


blah blah blah May 5, 2010 at 8:53 am

Wasn't this posted before on the website?


Gregg - admin May 5, 2010 at 2:19 pm

You're right blah blah blah! The story is titled Flying In A Play Pen. However, this is an expanded and improved version, which makes me feel somewhat better for failing to catch the reposted story.


blah blah blah May 5, 2010 at 8:54 am

*Wasn't this posted before on the website before?


david May 5, 2010 at 9:29 am

blah blah blah (kasha/kesha…..prob should know since i know an intern who works at universal records and met her) anyways…….there was no need to correct what you said, the second post didn't make as much sense…… repeating the same word in the same sentence

the best sentence would be your first, no need to say before at the end of the sentence

to the poster- you shoulda been like well excuse me for having my fat-a$$ in the small aisle where people try and get past, ma'am your a fire hazard and safety hazard please go back to the little girls chair so you can play with barbie and ken (apparently they broke up but who knows lol) Please refrainn from putting your behind in other peoples business as i am sure that you don't like others getting into your personal space, thank you and please dont come again


rerere May 5, 2010 at 10:09 am

I agree 100% with the poster. What happens if the plane encountered unexpected turbulence, or had to make an emergency landing? I bet the NTSB and FAA would get mad if heaven forbid the plane crashed, and no one could get out due to toys in the aisle.


altimeter 2992 May 5, 2010 at 10:39 am

Talk about fat people taking up your seating space…….. He gets you stuck in your seat and the plane is about to sink into the Hudson river!


Joey May 5, 2010 at 2:29 pm

That sounds like a safety hazard…


Laura May 6, 2010 at 3:27 pm

I would be annoyed too. I hate children and I hate them even more on planes. Crying babies, okay yeah obviously no one enjoys popping ears, but this does sound like a safety hazard in addition to being effing annoying!


Karl May 7, 2010 at 10:44 am

I'm glad I was not on this plane walking down the isle or worse, sitting next to this dingbat. I would certainly give her my opinion about the current state of her IQ. Signed: Grumpy old man.


Tux November 15, 2010 at 8:50 am

A well-placed poke in the rump for wonderbutt would have been hilarious.


Idiot story author February 15, 2013 at 1:57 am




post March 24, 2015 at 5:54 am



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