Flights From Hell flies you into the crazy skies with stories about the adventures and anxieties of airplane travel.

Commercial airline travel takes us far, far out of our comfort zone. We're herded into cylinders that zip hundreds of miles per hour at 30,000 feet, subjected to security screenings, confronted with delays and lost luggage, rushed to catch connecting flights, constrained to small seats, scrunched up with strangers, and surrounded by pathogens. Is it any wonder we end up becoming a bundle of raw nerves by journey's end?

Stuck In A Seat

April 27, 2009 Portly Stories

This happened to a friend, Carl. He took his window seat. All of the passengers watched as a rather large gent walked down the aisle carrying two seat belt extenders. Yes, he sat next to Carl, pushing himself into the narrow seat with great difficulty and pinning Carl against the window. Carl pressed the stewardess […]

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Fat Smelly Man

April 27, 2009 Portly Stories

In general, men don’t smell very good unless they’ve doused themselves with men’s cologne. I was on a small commuter flight, flight was full and the fattest guy you’ve ever seen had window seat next to me (I had the aisle). He poured over into my seat and there was no way his hot, fat […]

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Squeezed In

April 27, 2009 Portly Stories

This event occurred on a flight back from LAX to DC on a business trip. I am not a big guy; I am on the short side and only weigh 155. My original seat on this flight was a middle one towards the rear. After boarding we sat at the gate for about 45 minutes […]

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Forced To Split In Half

April 27, 2009 Portly Stories

My old boss, who is a plus-sized woman, to say the least, has always had the courtesy to purchase two coach seats when flying because she needs the room and doesn’t want to inconvenience other people. We board the plane for a business trip. I’m seated three rows behind her. Unfortunately, the airline has assigned […]

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Spilled Body & Spilt Water

April 27, 2009 Portly Stories

I once had a job that required me to travel quite a bit. I was travelling from Boston to LAX and was resigned to yet another long flight in my window seat. You always hope the seat next to you will be empty. Nope. The man that sat down to me was HUGE. His fat […]

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Personal Space Please

April 26, 2009 Passenger Stories

I recently flew from Los Angeles to New York and sat next to one of the most obnoxious passengers I have ever encountered. I should have known there was going to be a problem when the gentlemen who was assigned to sit next to me in a middle seat decided to sit in the aisle […]

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A Loooong Flight Home

April 26, 2009 Passenger Stories

It was on an international flight going from Amsterdam to Minneapolis. I was tired and dirty, having back-packed solo across Europe for two weeks, and I was ready to be going home. Not long after take-off I quickly nodded off in my seat, thankful for the opportunity to finally relax in a safe place, when […]

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The Nose Picker

April 26, 2009 Passenger Stories

On our way home from our honeymoon in Las Vegas in July, we were seated in a 3 seat row on a full flight. No seat was empty. My husband had the window seat and I was in the middle. It was hot and the AC didn’t seem to work. Then an older man with […]

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The Cougar And Her Prey

April 26, 2009 Passenger Stories

Several months ago my wife and I were on a flight from Boston to Providenciales in the Turks and Caicos Islands. While the flight was full, my wife had managed to score us seats in the exit row allowing us to stretch out a bit and enjoy our vacation from the start. Prior to getting […]

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Which Is Worse?

April 26, 2009 Passenger Stories

I saw the Mr Poopypants reference on CNN.com and I have had that experience more than once! Recently on a flight from San Francisco to Denver it was apparent that someone had done this right in my vicinity and clearly did nothing about it. I looked around and there were some toddlers. WHO are these […]

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Mr. Jerk

April 25, 2009 Passenger Stories

It was early 2000 on a flight from New Jersey to Atlanta. I was finally going home after a long working four-week trip. The flight was packed. Truly, sardines have more room in those cans. Spring hadn’t quite arrived. It was relatively warm, but there was still snow on the ground in Jersey. However, conditions […]

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Stares And Glares From Snooty Girl

April 25, 2009 Passenger Stories

I was on a flight home from a long and exhausting Las Vegas to Seattle. We were taking a late night flight home as to get the most out of the great weather. Well at about midnight we boarded the plane and took our seats and were all on edge due to the lack of […]

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