Kids Create Nightmare

August 3, 2010

in Baby & Kid Stories

About two years ago I was on the worst flight of my life. The flight was from Kansas City to Chicago Ohare. Well after everyone had boarded I requested to be moved to a window seat, with an open aisle seat since I’m a bigger guy (the aircraft, a 737, had several open rows). Anyway the folks at American Airlines accommodated this request, and moved me to the exit row, also allowing me some extra leg room.

The plane taxis to the runway and I look around and realize one of the worst nightmares of flying – there were a ton of kids on the plane. Well after take off, once we hit cruising altitude, a kid who is maybe 6 years old is sent to sit in the exit row I’m in, next to his parents. First of all you have to be 16 to sit in an exit row, second of all I normally would not have a problem with this had the kid not immediately and rudely said something that implied my being overweight would cause the plane to crash. I call the flight attendant’s attention to the problem, and they move the kid to the open seat behind me, next to some one else.

About this time in the flight another kid gets up and starts doing the classic how many times can I hit everyone’s seat before I get yelled at. The flight attendants quickly had the sleeping parents get control of the kid. Meanwhile four babies all start crying, the chain reaction of one starts crying, the rest follow. As their parents try to calm them down, the kid behind me starts kicking the back of my seat as hard as he can, and at consistent 2-3 second intervals. I just sucked it up and tried listening to my music, but this hour long flight seemed to last longer than the 18 hours it took to fly from Thailand to Chicago.

The point behind this rant? Control your kids, and keep them near you on the flight. Who lets a six year old (okay he may have been closer to 8 or 9) sit away from his parents on any flight? This flight was a freaking zoo, and me (I was 18 at the time) and my parents both had the same idea to book it off the plane and rush to the car lot the second the doors were opened.

{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }

Jon August 4, 2010 at 5:36 pm

A separate kids-only section would solve this problem.


rerere August 5, 2010 at 10:36 am



Aaron August 6, 2010 at 5:00 am

I've saying this for years. Those flying with children should have their own set of rows. That way I can book my seat as far away as possible.


Hack October 1, 2012 at 4:35 pm

You idiots. Some adults behave worse than the children.


Teenaged Tourist August 5, 2010 at 6:08 am

Do you want to hear the beauty of flying in China? Flying is still considered as a form of luxury so seeing toddlers on an Air China flight would be relatively uncommon! Otherwise they appear to be well behaved with their parents beside them. So far I haven't had a toddler attack my comfort level on a Chinese Airline.


Kyle March 29, 2011 at 10:06 am

I live in beijing, i'm 14, i travel a lot (cause of my dad), and guess what you get arrogant adults forcing your seat up. I'm not trying to fight for kids as for i travel a lot especially to england (12 hour flight) or Uk to sydney 16 hours and i hate it when you get this brat who looks at you with the face : what you gonna do?. i just HATE IT. KILL THEM ALL! they drive me nuts.


Ron August 5, 2010 at 7:45 am

While I agree, as a parent, that parents need to control their children, much of your commentary seems not focused on this but on kids on flights in general. This is where you and I are going to disagree (and probably many others) will disagree.


anod August 5, 2010 at 1:10 pm

Kids should be checked, just like luggage and made to ride in the luggage hold….Hey, if it's good enough for pets…….


ps August 5, 2010 at 3:30 pm

Then it's also good enough for the portly and self important fliers. Hey, it's the luck of the draw, and this was as unlucky as you can get. This poster endured a horrible experience since airfare is now about the equivalent of a bus ticket price in the 70's. Business and first fares now? About the same as coach in the 70's adjusted for inflation. Wanna escape the rabble? Bump up and shut up or take a bus or drive.


numb3rs March 29, 2011 at 11:24 am

If you hate sitting near kids on airplanes so much, why don't you go sit in the luggage hold yourself? Nice and quiet!


Hack October 1, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Anods should also be put in the luggage hold. NO EXCEPTIONS!


The Logger August 9, 2010 at 1:00 am

Time to mandate licensing for parenthood, and shock collars for brats on planes, with controlers issued to FAs.

Moron parents and their spawn in cargo, no exceptions.


Ron August 9, 2010 at 3:28 am

You really want to put the buzzer in the hands of some of the same FA's that we comment about on this website? Just give it to me and I'll take care of it…lol


numb3rs March 29, 2011 at 11:32 am

I find it really sad how a few stupid parents can ruin it for everyone with kids. Honestly…? Making threats like that against children is not OK. Especially because most of them are perfectly delightful on planes!


Rich October 15, 2010 at 1:10 am

A kid kicking a seat is unacceptable, a kid running around whether banging a seat or not is unacceptable. But babies crying? A 6 year old making a tactless comment? Give me abreak. Flying is not limited to non-families. I have traveled for many years and used to think the worst was being on a flight with a screaming baby. Then I found out there is something worse….. being the parent of that child. You think THEY want the screaming? Young kids don't know how to clear their ears and it HURTS so they cry. Deal with it.


Tux November 15, 2010 at 8:29 am

Maybe it's just because I've got a thick skin and a self-hating sense of humor, but I would have been laughing pretty hard if a kid said my fat arse would crash the plane! LOL I would have said something like, "Better watch out, I've already taken down three this year!"


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