Rocker Praises Portly Passenger

July 5, 2010

in Portly Stories

I am in a rock band that is somewhat famous yet not famous enough to own its own private jet. So needless to say my band mates and I fly a lot.

On one of our flights I walk down the aisle and was horrified to see the huge man sitting there in my seat (aisle seat). He explained calmly to me that I could have his seat which was next to him; the bassist got the window seat. He was very nice the whole trip and tried not to get his fat on me too much. And he didn’t smell.

After the flight he handed me a envelope and walked off. I opened the envelope and found a note which read:

“Dear Seatmate,

I have eaten a lot of twinkies in my life and I enjoyed them. I bet you fly a lot and hate getting stuck next to people like me. I enjoyed my flight and I hope you did too. Sorry my fat rubbed on you.

Your Friend,

Fat F**k Fred”

Enclosed was a $50 bill. This made my day, and proved fat people are not all evil.

If you read this Fred thank you, and my band thanks you for drinks at the bar that night.

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Laura July 5, 2010 at 4:14 pm

What band is it? That's a great story.


Josh July 6, 2010 at 4:23 am

So…in order for a fat person to be considered "not evil" they need to pay you?



MM July 6, 2010 at 4:54 am

Josh, you're giving PETA a run for the biggest buzzkill award.

This is my favorite story.


Bob July 6, 2010 at 8:03 am

Yea, right. And tell me what other dreams you had last night. BTW having a wii game system does not make you a rock star, sorry.


Peace Lover July 6, 2010 at 12:09 pm

Thats so sweet. This just goes to show that there are some really great people out there.


Tonya July 14, 2010 at 6:38 am

What so if they are fat they are evil or there is something wrong with them because they are overwieght…. Good thing you did not say the name of your "famous band" because all of those fat chick's that make up you fan base would boycot you What an ass


Kyra September 23, 2010 at 2:37 pm

Now that's a great story! No, it's not that we expect to be paid, it's just nice that the guy acknowledged that his size was going to inconvenience other people and make them uncomfortable. If you're fat and you have an entitlement attitude, you're always going to be met with annoyance and hostility. If you're fat and you are apologetic about it (because face it, if part of you is sitting in my seat or hoisting yourself up out of your seat and causing whiplash to the person in front of you, you're bothering other people).


debbie January 3, 2015 at 6:50 pm

you're an a**hole


Jean June 28, 2018 at 4:42 pm

This is a nice story. Everybody blames heavy people for taking too much seat. Nobody ever points the finger at the f*cking airlines for cramming so many people into a plane that anybody over 185 lbs needs to buy an extra ticket.


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