Advice Sought About Stripper Girlfriend

March 8, 2010

in Couples Stories

On a relatively quick flight from Dallas to Orlando, I was seated next to a pretty cool guy around 28-29 years old. I usually refrain from talking to people on planes to maintain my sanity and to make sure there aren’t any false senses of friendship which lead to hours of conversation. About 20 minutes into the flight this guy breaks the silence and starts talking about how he’s from Vancouver, Oregon and is in construction. He asks me what I do, and I reply that I’m a college student majoring in psychology… This is where I went wrong.

Despite that I have no real qualifications to psychologize people as a student, he immediately opens up about his relationship woes over the years. He passes me an “airborne fizzy” and informs me about his inability to commit, his attraction to noncommittal girls and how he can’t seem to get his life on track. Notably, he mentions that he’s only going to Orlando to meet his stripper girlfriend he met a short time ago, and that he’s worried because she has a child and he may not be ready to be a father yet. I didn’t really buy the stripper deal, but whatever.

This all leads him to ask me, “So you’re in Psychology, what do you think I should do? Do you think I should marry this girl?” How the hell should I know what he should do! I just want to go to Epcot Center, maybe the Animal Kingdom, and this guy wants me to make his life decisions on a three hour flight? By the way, my girlfriend is sitting next to me in the window seat, and here I am trying to parse through this guy’s relationship problems with my girlfriend rolling her eyes wondering why I wasn’t more committed. I try and tell him that his decisions are his own, but at the same time he should not pass up opportunities he might regret. This continued all the way until landing where we made that awkward walk to the baggage claim.

While waiting for the bags, I noticed a pretty attractive gal waiting on the other side of the carousel. She had pink streaks in her hair, and was wearing a short skirt and tank top. I quietly thought to myself, “Wow, that girl looks like a stripper.” At that moment the tormented man runs over and gives her a giant hug and at the same time embraces her son next to her. They walk off out of the airport hand in hand with smiles all around.

Good luck to you tormented relationship guy! Hopefully you committed yourself to that gal and her son and have made a life for yourself.

– Formerpsych

{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

tdf March 8, 2010 at 8:29 pm

Been there, done that. I actually had a stranger who I'd chatted with before take-off WAKE ME UP repeatedly to ask me to tell him what his dreams meant.

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mel March 8, 2010 at 11:33 pm

I don't believe that Vancouver is in Oregon.

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david March 9, 2010 at 3:17 am

there is a vancouver in oregon, just not the one most people know about

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Trixi March 9, 2010 at 8:12 am

Vancouver is in Washington State, near the Oregon border.

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mel March 9, 2010 at 11:49 am

Trixi – that is exactly what I was thinking

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rerere March 9, 2010 at 2:41 pm

Cheating on your girlfriend, huh?

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ace March 9, 2010 at 3:53 pm

The real Vancouver is in British Columbia

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poco March 9, 2010 at 4:22 pm

What's an "airborne fizzy"?

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Trixi March 10, 2010 at 7:21 am

Actually, Vancouver, WA was incorporated about 30 years prior to beautiful Vancouver, B.C., making it the real Vancouver. Vancouver, WA is thinking about changing their name to Fort Vancouver.

However nobody probably cares. Just a Washington girl like me–what can I say? Heh.

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Kad March 14, 2010 at 5:53 am

Psych major huh? Apparently not a very good one. But neither was I.

Psych is the catch-all major for people who don't know what the f**k they want to do with their lives. Only a very few are screwed up enough to actually understand the human condition, so like others I switched to Political Science (also a behavioural science at heart) in my 2nd year. That was 20 years ago, and my how the world has changed.

Some of your statements:

Wow, does she look like a stripper. I didn't really buy the stripper deal…I usually refrain from talking to people on planes to maintain my sanity. …a pretty attractive gal….

Sir, you appear to be a confused a-hole.

First, you get on a cramped public vehicle, then try to maintain a personal and mental distance/detachment from one of your single serving friends. He didn't seem like a bad guy. Probably confused, and wondering aloud is he was willing to make the biggest commitment of his life.

I mean, he's already on the damn airplane, going to see her, on the other side of the country. That speaks volumes about his willingness to commit, and yet you missed it. The hugs he gave the young lady and the child mean he must have done it before, probably several times.

I'm not sure if you meant your GF wondered why you weren't more committed to her, or to the conversation with your temporary friend. It's easy to be confident when nobody who knows you can hear what blather your over-priced textbooks have infected your mind with. The real test is, can you think for yourself, as a fellow human being.

You failed.

First of all, what's wrong with a person being a stripper? Apparently there is a market for it. Not the best lifestyle, but hey, is her child fed, clothed? The underside of bootstrapping yourself is that sometimes things that are undesirable are required, if those are the only options open to you.

Secondly, I can't tell if you were talking out of both sides of your mouth. I mean, trying to answer a honest man's questions while impressing your girlfriend at the same time, with the same words. My girlfriend (and wife, soon), is not always impressed either by my words or my actions, but let me tell you something: I try to be honest with her, and apologize always and without reservation if I offend her sensibilities. She is my better half, and she knows it.

You would have done far better to ignore your girlfriend for a while, and honestly answer the man's questions. Maybe you had the look of someone (besides being a non-threatening stranger) who he could think out loud to. I would be willing to venture a bet that your GF would have been very impressed if you, though unqualified, gave it your best shot, always with the codicile that you are not a qualified or certified therapist, and talked to the guy.

Women, my misguided friend, enjoy a man who knows how to speak in more than grunts, one who can put together a coherent thought.

You would rather live as a Superior Being though. One not given to suffering the tribulations and petty worries of mere mortals.

The Flight From Hell was in your mind, and your own creation. You suffered a talkative seat mate. Wow. Next time, take a couple placebos and pretend to rest, since you are nervous on flights. It would be a good cover for your inability to socialize.

What is an airborne fizzy?

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Ed August 11, 2010 at 4:22 am

Dude, lighten up.

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Bob August 11, 2010 at 9:27 am

Kad, have you ever listened to yourself ? You sir are a douche bag, not to mention a complete waste of space, oops I guess I did mention it but you probably hear that kind of thing all the time when people refer to you. And yes, I would also like to know what exactly is an "airbourne fizzy"

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Jane May 10, 2010 at 10:57 am

I actually enjoy talking to people on flights, especially since I often have to travel from one coast to the other. We enjoy drinks together, it kills time, and there is something inherently satisfying about having a good conversation with a total stranger that you'll probably never see again.

I'm lucky that I've rarely been subjected to flights from hell and even luckier I end up next to cool people. Damn lucky.

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