Gentleman Passes Gas

November 29, 2014

in Odor Stories

I had the aisle seat on a two-hour flight heading to London Heathrow Airport. It was a 3+3 cabin configuration; to the left of me sat two smartly dressed English businessmen.

Shortly after takeoff, one of the gentlemen started passing gas, silently but deadly. I never found out which one because we were all very polite and never said a word. But it did not stop the other neighbouring rows from giving us the looks and complaining. The smell was awful and I had to exercise extreme self-control. A guy seated right behind us suddenly got up and started cursing and complaining loudly. Three girls on the same row across the aisle started laughing loudly. People started talking and it was not easy to look them in the eye – I was also a suspect.

The loud guy eventually went ahead and sat in the empty business class rows, but the FA wouldn’t let him stay there. After he explained and she got a sniff, she sprayed half a liter of some stuff which actually managed to kill the smell. He then had to go back to his seat. And then the gentleman started passing gas again… I escaped by spending half of the flight in and around the toilets at the back of the plane.

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Chollie December 2, 2014 at 6:39 pm

Reading this story, it seems obvious to me it was the giggling girls passing the gas.

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Author December 20, 2014 at 7:46 am

No, it was unmistakeably to my left…

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adad September 30, 2015 at 12:34 am

girls dont fart

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paul December 23, 2014 at 4:05 pm

A dog smells his own business first.

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Norman Hauptman December 26, 2014 at 10:16 am

Paid El Al $6300.00 round trip NYC/Tel Aviv. November 30, 2014, 7:00PM EST, Flight departed JFK/NYC, window seat # 3A. On my right was passenger asleep, her seat horozontal, her feet reaching wall in front of us. I could not walk normally to toilet during entire trip. Had to hold onto upper luggage compartment and widely split my legs to maneuver past the obstacle her legs, feet and seat challenged me with. Same upon return from toilet. El Al was ethically obligated to inform me in advance of this defect but did not. What amt of $ is due me for the substandard first class journey? Lucky I did not fall and hurt myself.

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Maggie May 13, 2015 at 1:13 am

You should have yelled, "It wasn't me!!"

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Andrew Beagle January 8, 2017 at 2:50 pm

Needed to unload SCAT.

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Mr. Hugh G. Rection January 15, 2017 at 2:13 pm

Airline travel today requires all passengers to at least smell poop, in fact, the normal procedure in doing business with any airline is to usually have to eat some. Consider yourself lucky.

Reply

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