Kid Kick’s Passenger’s Face

February 25, 2010

in Baby & Kid Stories

July 2nd, 2003 I was on Northwest flight 852 from Anchorage, Alaska to Detroit, Michigan, approximately a 6 hour red eye on a 757-300. I was only 15 at the time and by myself. Surprisingly the flight was packed full. My seat was back in row 43 and as always I had a window seat. Rows 40-48 were in their own little mini cabin in the back. In this section sat an entire high school track team and a few of their parents and a couple siblings; I was one of the very few odd balls.

The 2 seat mates were only a couple years younger than me. They were not a problem till an hour into the flight when I really needed to get up for the restroom but they had all their bags practically unpacked in the floor. After tripping over them I managed to make it.

But none of that team was really the problem. It was the young kid, couldn’t have been more than 6 years old, sitting behind me. About an hour and a half into the flight he wouldn’t sleep and was bored. Throwing his little temper tantrum he kept kicking my seat hard as he could. I tried to ignore it, figured his mother would do something about it, wrong. I was trying to type a letter on my laptop and after 1/2 an hour of constant seat back assaults I turned around and politely asked his mother to get him under control; she just glared at me and told me to mind my own $@#%#$ business. The flight attendant finally told miss stuck up to get her kid under control. She did and finally a little peace. Put my laptop away and decided to get some sleep.

Propped up a pillow and stared out the window before finally passing out. About 15 minutes later I was awakened by a foot, sneaker and all, blasting me right in the side of the face. Little Johny son of a bitch was throwing a tantrum again. For such a young kid he had quite the kick. I could feel my face swelling around my eye. I had enough, paged the flight attendant and got an ice pack, got up, grabbed my bag and started searching the cabin for an open seat. Three hours left of the flight; I wasn’t going to sit there anymore. Finally came across the only 2 on the entire aircraft, a row in 1st class, and sat down next to the window. The first class attendant soon told me to go back to the economy seats, but I didn’t have to explain as the attendant who got me the ice pack came up there, said to let me stay, and gave me a can of Pepsi.

That was the one and only time I’ve sat in First Class. Unlike economy where I had been served just supper, now in first class I was also served a breakfast about an hour before landing.

The first half of that flight was hell and the rest I had a pounding headache. I’m just glad I didn’t have to sit back there anymore. I got a black eye that lasted 2 weeks, but I got a free first class upgrade for 3 hours and an extra meal, so at least Northwest made up for the hell that some kid put me through. Little kids like that should have to sit at the bulkheads just to avoid these kinds of situations.

Six years later and I still remember that flight clear as day due to the hell created by that one little kid.

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

the logger February 26, 2010 at 6:04 am

Want a kid, be a parent. We all work 2 or three jobs so we can accumulate junk that we don't need. Then we wonder why johnny comes home with a needle in his arm. Johnny can't learn to read until he learns to behave like a human, and thats the parent's job. If johnny kicks you in the head, that's an assault.

Hold the parent responsible, as he/she is kicking you in the head by proxy.

Arrest the parent upon landing, and put them on a no fly list for one year.

Maybe that will smarten them up.

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Joe February 26, 2010 at 8:41 am

I would have hit that little brat. No joke. There are so many little kids who behavior can be solved with a smack to the back of the head. Also, who ever reads this, don't start putting stuff up about child abuse and how I "must" hate kids because that just takes up room.

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the logger February 26, 2010 at 8:48 am

Hey joe:

This site is made just for you.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=b

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Joe February 27, 2010 at 11:01 am

LOL thanks

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david February 27, 2010 at 3:05 pm

did the foot smell?

pillows even though they are soft dont offer much protection……next time ya know lil kid behind means no leaning on window

when i have a young kid behind me i dont bring my laptop out, never kno if imma have my seat kicked and accidently hit my laptop off my lap or table

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RJ March 1, 2010 at 9:30 am

At least you got to sit elsewhere (first class is always nice!). That doesn't excuse that kid's behavior – or worse, his mother's behavior. My standard response is, "It's my (insert whatever you like here) business if your (insert whatever you like here) kid is kicking my seat nonstop and you don't do a (insert whatever you like here) thing about it. Did you raise little Johnny yourself, or did the wolves make you take him back?"

And I LIKE kids. I don't like spoiled brats!!!

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Mindy March 5, 2010 at 5:37 am

I agree in full with Joe and RJ.

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Chuck Male March 13, 2010 at 4:18 pm

Ooh, ooh. Here's how to handle this. I had the same problem once. The mom told me to F off, so the next time the kid kicked my seat I told the kid kicking my seat doesn't get your mother's attention, and kicking the seat to get my attention isn't helping you. You should kick your mom instead of me.

This appeared to work very well. A few minuets later the kid kicked his mom so much, and I was able to relax for a while. Granted, he was still making a lot of noise, but it was amusing to hear him kicking that breeder of his.

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FF@BA September 1, 2013 at 3:39 pm

Dear Blackeyed OP : I realize this thread is *long* dead ( never stopped me before 😛 ) and that your poor eye has probably healed by now – but I just had to say something to your post. I am SO very sorry that happened to you. Neither mother *nor* child deserved to be in public, let alone an airplane. I'm glad you got to sit in first class and had a Pepsi — if you'd been a little older, I'm sure you could have used something a little stronger. I feel so badly for you.

I *like* the idea of "Kick your mother instead", but …. my LORD! We don't want that brat kicking *anyone*, even his incubator – I see an episode of Doc Phil coming, and a trip to boot camp for the rotten little bastard. ( Which, in the original sense of the word, could very well be accurate. )

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